Oh, the gym. I’m lucky enough to live in a building with its own gym (which is mercifully never busy because everyone in my building is already in shape or something). But man, for years I went to one really popular gym in Philly and, dang, I saw some things. Gyms are sweaty, smelly microcosms, with their own hilarious manners (everybody gets a turn on the elliptical, dammit!) and personalities. And it seems that whether you’re talking the fanciest upscale city gym, or smallest local workout center, there are certain people you’ll always find there. After the jump, we run through some of the women we always run into when we’re sweating our butts off. (And if you get a chance, check out GQ’s hilarious list of the Gym Guys You Really Don’t Want To Be, too!)
1. The woman who’s trying to do the least amount of exercise possible. She walks or rides the bikes on minimum speed for hours to avoid breaking a sweat.
2. The experienced dancer who takes classes only to ignore the instructor and do as she pleases.
3. The woman who is constantly stretching.
4. The over achiever who does the elliptical before class and lifts weights after.
5. The girl who puts on makeup to go to the gym.
6. The hardcore workout freak who spend most of the day at the gym.
7. The woman who knows every routine perfectly.
8. The woman who’s wearing a full face of makeup and coordinating designer workout wear, hair done, and is sort of posing on the Stairmaster. You know, instead of actually using it because she doesn’t want to get sweaty.
9. The woman in the locker room who has no body insecurities and will strike up a convo with you completely naked.
10. The woman who has no idea how to use any of the equipment.
11. The woman who uses the community blowdryer to dry her pubes.
12. The really intense woman who is obviously racing the person next to her on the treadmill.
13. The woman who has no idea what she’s doing in her jazz aerobics/zumba class, but bless her heart, she’s trying.
14. The woman that is so strong half the guys at the gym are afraid of her.
Who did we miss? Share your fave gym ladies in the comments!