9 BS “Facts” About Panties Everyone Thinks Are True

Jessica Wakeman | March 22, 2013 - 9:00 am

A few weeks ago, we asked readers to vote on a post they wanted me to write. The winner was BS facts about panties everyone thinks is true. Here it is!

It’s weird how we learn stuff about how to be a woman, isn’t it? I don’t know about you, but my mom never sat down and talked with me about the horrors of visible panty lines (VPL) or the merits of thongs versus G-strings. I just soaked up these things through girly osmosis.

Except all of it may not be … true.

These are some “facts” about panties which I can assure you, without a doubt, are not true:

1. Thongs are uncomfortable. Honestly, the right fit and the right fabric can make them more comfortable than briefs.

2. Guys care about what your panties look like. I have yet to meet one who noticed, let alone gave a shit.

3. “Period panties” have to be ugly. Wear whatever the hell you want as “period panties.” A $24 pair of lace-trim cheekies from Victoria’s Secret? Why not.

4. You should hand wash them. Who has the time? I suppose if you want to hand your underwear down to your children you should hand wash, but given that they’ll probably be period stained in a year and I’ll toss ‘em out, I machine wash.

5. VPL is the end of the world. Stop staring at my butt, you pervert.

6. You must change them every day. I mean, you should. But do you have to? No. Nobody ever died from wearing undies two days in a row. (Maybe somebody got a urinary tract infection, though.)

7. Satin panties are the sexiest. They actually make your ladybusiness kind of sweaty.

8. Don’t sleep with panties on so your vagina can breathe. I’ll bet a man invented that one.

9. Wearing a G-string means you’re more confident with your body. Some of us feel sexy in granny panties, too.

What other BS facts about panties do you know? Tell us in the comments!

Email me at Jessica@TheFrisky.com. Follow me on Twitter