How do you solve a problem like Austin Whaley? The 18-year-old Covington, Kentucky, resident had taken to running into crowded bingo halls and shouting “BINGO!” to the dismay of local bingo aficionados.
Local police picked Whaley up last month after he and a gaggle of friends wandered into a bingo hall and began effusively shouting bingo. “This caused the hall to quit operating since they thought someone had won,” explained arresting officer Police Sgt. Richard Webster. “This delayed the game by several minutes and caused alarm to patrons.”
But it gets even worse!
“At first, everybody started moaning and groaning when they thought they’d lost,” Webster said. “When they realized it wasn’t a real bingo, they started hooting and hollering and yelling and cussing. People take their bingo very seriously.” Apparently!
The police charged him with a second-degree disorderly conduct for his out-of-control bingo rampage. This past week, Whaley appeared in front of Kenton District Judge Douglas Grothaus, who issued the peculiar sentence: Don’t utter the word “bingo” for six months. If he manages to abstain, his criminal record will be expunged.
“Just like you can’t run into a theater and yell ‘fire’ when it’s not on fire, you can’t run into a crowded bingo hall and yell ‘bingo’ when there isn’t one,” explained Webster. On a related note, Covington, Kentucky, must be really, really boring. [Cincinatti.com]