Andy Samberg & Joanna Newsom Are Engaged

  • Andy Samberg and singer-songwriter Joanna Newsom are engaged! Do you think Justin Timberlake will get the happy couple a dick in a box? [People]
  • Janet Jackson got secretly married to a billionaire last year and didn’t tell us. Some friend you are.  [Stupid Celebrities]
  • So, some dude wants to start a holiday called National Have Sex With An Ugly Person Day. How charitable of him! [Nerve]
  • The priceist Starbucks beverage in existence is a $47.30 “Quadriginoctuple Frap.” It’s got 40 shots, which might kill you. [Newser]
  • We’re hella excited that next season of “America’s Next Top Model” will featured male and female model hopefuls. Here’s one of the dude contestants, a 22-year-old drag queen named Cory Hindorff who performs as “Serena Starr.” [Gay Star News]
  • A love letter to nine-year-0ld Quvenzhané Wallis (and her puppy purses) … [Crunk Feminist Collective]
  • … also, sales of puppy purses exploded this morning after Quvenzhané rocked one on the red carpet. [TMZ]
  • Nine TV characters who desperately need online dating. [How About Me]
  • How to age cheap wine almost anywhere. Good, because that’s the only kind of wine we can afford. [Bon Appetit]
  • Why penis enlargement is not such a good idea for penises. [Em & Lo]

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[Photo: Getty]