Consider me awed and humbled by the discovery of my Facebook “Other” folder. How did I not know about this!? This morning, Julie informed me that in your Facebook messages inbox there exists an “Other” folder. It’s like the Bermuda Triangle of Facebook messages. Invites, messages from non-friends and other virtual detritus all get sucked in there and disappear. Winona refers to it as “a second chance at life.” I concur. Well, obviously I had to scroll through all 99 unread messages RIGHT AWAY and see what I’d missed in the last three years. Holy shit! Consider my ego sufficiently stroked and my faith in life renewed. After the jump, the treasures I found in my “Other” folder.
1. A lost text message wishing me Happy New Year in 2012. “Because I don’t expect to be awake at midnight, HAPPY NEW YERRRRRRR!” It’s from an unknown number, but clearly someone I know. So, if you sent me this text message two New Years ago, THANK YOU and I don’t have your phone number.
2. An apology/explanation from a guy I thought had blown me off. He had cancelled one of our dates and then I never heard from him again. So, I forgot about him. Little did I know he had sent me a message that went into my “Other” folder explaining that he had lost his phone and would I like to reschedule our drink. YES! I WOULD!
3. Responses from multiple “Be My Boyfriends.” I just about died when “Be My Boyfriend: Bald Logo” made me a video. In my “Other” folder there were responses from others. Most notably, from Drunk Guy Who Sang “Bohemian Rhapsody” In The Back Of A Cop Car (a direct quote from his message: “I would die to date a hottie like you. If you want I’ll serenade you , forever.”) and Guy With Tattooed Shoes (he’s married but he liked the article). All this time I thought Be My Boyfriends haven’t been getting my letters, but they have!
4. Date offers from strangers. I’m not the type to accept a date with a stranger. But one guy made it hard to resist:
“I just read a little article that you wrote about a date. When he asked for money to pay for dinner, my vagina died. Funny! Thanks. I wish you lived here so that I could fall in love with you.”
5. Messages from readers. I think the best “Other” messages were ones from readers thanking me for helping them with a particular issue through reading one of my pieces — anything from settling a household debate about how to do the laundry to helping heal after being cheated on. Or just telling my they liked what I wrote. Seriously, that means the world to me. It puts a pep in my fingers as I type. If you wrote me and I never responded, that was because I never saw it. But I am thanking you now.
6. A random ego boost. “So pretty.” That’s all it said. I’ll take it!
7. A stranger telling me an ex-boyfriend I wrote about in a Dealbreaker was jerk. I’m way over that relationship, but it was nice to get that affirmation from a stranger that our breakup was for the best:
“Just read I wasn’t Jewish enough. Was that you. Shame Andrew would not address the issues before they became too much to overcome. Maybe not such a mensch after all. Just saying!”
8. Someone asking me if I was the person who wrote an open letter to EducationConnection.com. YES! I was So I wrote him back. And he wrote me back! Here was his response:
“Hah, I totally forgot I even sent you this. If I recall correctly, I was riding the bus and had that jingle stuck in my head, so I searched it on my phone and found your article.It made me laugh, and I just wanted to say thanks for the read.”
9. Unsolicited dating advice of the tough love variety. By tough love, I mean telling me how awful I am.
“the problem is really simple: YOU are your own worst enemy. YOU claim you’re [SIC] “responsibility for my singlehood,” but we both know this is a lie. And that’s the real reason why you’re single. You’re only interested in hearing advice that doesn’t conflict with your already distorted view of dating/relationships. Like most women, you don’t want to hear the truth. You only want to hear what makes you FEEL BETTER. And that’s the real reason why you’re still single.”
Well, not everything you find in your “Other” folder can be heartwarming. This did, however, provide me with a good laugh.
Seriously, if you didn’t know about your Facebook “Other” folder, I advise you to go spelunking in it right now. Please report back about what you find.