How To Get Some Gravy On Thanksgiving
Surviving the holidays is always stressful. And if you’re single, it’s the perfect time to eff the pain away! Thanksgiving weekend provides a few days to hunt for hotties — especially if you’re traveling somewhere. But even if you’re stuck home alone, make sure you take full advantage of all the seasonal action by following The Frisky’s Guide To Getting Some Gravy On Thanksgiving!
Park It: Go to places you can hang around stress free for at least a solid hour, like a bar or a bookstore. Do not run around, wasting your prime time on stupid shopping errands. People, including hot dudes, are just frazzled and rushed at those kinds of places. There’s no room for love when you’re fighting people for door busters. And who wants to play the odds that you’ll get in a long line behind a tall drink of water?
TIP: If you do get stuck shopping, picking up holiday personnel is easier than regular year round staff. Just ask them a question that forces them to lead you on an informational journey. Then joke around and show them a little empathy for having to work on the worst shopping day of the years — it’ll go a long way. But be warned, seasonal staffers are tired when they get off work late at night.
Dressing: Wear something that wouldn’t shame you in front of your parents. Everyone will be stepping it up on Thanksgiving weekend. You may pack your dirty laundry when you’re headed home to momma, but that doesn’t mean you should pack your ugly sweatshirts and period underwear either. Look like someone loves you already by showing up well-groomed and awesome, like the finest version of yourself. Make sure you’re not too fancy though, because it might come off as aloof. Just like your old yearbook message told you, stay cool!
TIP: You do not have to wear that family-proof dress that doesn’t show your cleavage out later, but hoochie gear around this holiday will make you look like you’re begging for it. Trashy club clothes seem desperate when you’re standing next to people who just ate dinner with their grandma. So save your best ho look for a wild holiday like New Years!
Ye Ole Friends: Get back in touch with buddies who might be visiting or live in the town you’re gonna be stuck in. Catching up with people from your past made lead you to some happenin’ parties with plenty o’ babes for you to choose from. And hey, even if they wind up being lame, it’ll give you an excuse to get out and try your luck.
TIP: Look up the dudes from your past that you may still be carrying a (even small) torch for and see what they’re up to. Hey, it’s a different type of vacation fling!
WARNING: Married friends are fun to visit, but do NOT expect them to be your wingmen or lead you to a palace of single men. They’re going to be chumps when it comes to party going. So make sure you see them early or they’ll cock block you at night.
Warm It Up: There is one major conundrum when facing the holiday fling. Where do you go to fornicate if you’re both staying with family? Hotels are often booked and you don’t want to sober up and get left out in the cold! So, for a quick fix, get in a car or just get it on in a bar bathroom. You can kick it up a notch by driving to a romantic look-out point. Sigh…just like high school!
Don’t Add The I To DU: The police are out in full force over the weekend and rightfully so. Do NOT drive drunk, it’s risky for you and the other people on the road. Plus scary bad driving, or worse yet, getting arrested, aren’t exactly aphrodisiacs! Don’t ruin your bad girl fun by getting in too much trouble.
Chatty Cathy: Do NOT bitch about your family. Complaining about being forced home for the holidays will not get you even a sympathy screw. You’ll just seem like a Debbie Downer. A joke or two about your Uncle Stu’s epic fart may be funny, eventually, but no one will sit around while you whine like your pain is unique. Save it for your shrink and keep the convo topics light and flirty. Talk about the ways your hometown has changed or, if you still live there, look for some fresh meat, er, visitors.
TIP: A great way to draw attention to yourself, kill time, isolate yourself to be hit on, perk up the dance party, and show off your booty, is to pick out some rad tunes! So, if you need a conversation starter, just use your spare change to get some hits. But be warned, if you’re in a Johnny Cash kind of bar, don’t go busting out MGMT. Keep the vibe!
Holiday Spirit: It doesn’t matter if it’s the hot toddies’ talking — be a beacon of those warm, friendly, holiday vibes. This is the one time of year you are welcome, nay, expected, to smile at handsome strangers. While flashing your pearly whites at a stud is a good idea all year, around this time, people really welcome it!
TIP: The nights before and after Thanksgiving are best, but if you’re going to hit up some places on the actual day, make sure you go late — at least 9 or 10pm. Wait until the turkey (or tofurkey) has settled. The only people out and about around happy hour are sad, old loners. Well, if that’s your type, dig in! Hey, they could definitely use some holiday cheer.