5 Awkward Halloween Moments And How To Recover

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OH CRAP

Halloween is a crazy holiday. Between the costumes and the candy binges, anything can happen, so it’s good to be prepared for a variety of scenarios. We’ve rounded up a few of the most awkward Halloween moments, from being the only one at work who dressed up to having evidence of your debauchery posted online, along with instructions on how to deal with each one. Get the details, after the jump!

Scenario #1: You walk into your office decked out in a ripped wedding dress and fake blood, stoked to show off your zombie bride costume, only to find everyone else … is wearing business casual.

How To Recover:  If your costume is simple enough that you can duck into the bathroom, scrub off some makeup, and emerge looking almost normal, go for it; otherwise, you’re just gonna have to own it. Throw your hands up in the air and say, “Well, I guess I won the costume contest!” Be the first to laugh about it so no one has the chance to laugh at you.

Scenario #2: Maybe you thought your company didn’t really celebrate Halloween, maybe you didn’t feel like dressing up, but for whatever reason you’re the only person at work not wearing a costume. If the boss decides the next round of layoffs based on who is the least festive, you’re screwed.

How To Recover: This is the one time I’ll condone being like those annoying people you meet at Halloween parties who aren’t dressed up and have a “clever” reason why. Tell people you’re a fugitive trying to blend in. Or a stunt double for a celebrity you kind of resemble. Lame? Yes. But it’s better than nothing.

Scenario #3: You hooked up with a guy who seemed like a total dreamboat, but in the light of day, well, not so much.

How To Recover: You can either get to know him in his normal clothes, or gather up your fairy wings, wish him “Happy Halloween,” and take it as a lesson about the seductive powers of a Don Draper costume.

Scenario #4: You decide to stay in on Halloween night, so you grab a fun-size Snickers and put on an episode of “Dexter.” Forty minutes later the entire candy bowl is empty, and trick-or-treaters will be arriving any moment.

How To Recover: Turn off your porch light and skip this year–better to give them nothing than hand out sticks of gum and cans of diet coke. Then go lie down and sleep off that sugar rush.

Scenario #5: The day after Halloween, you groggily open your laptop and discover you’ve been tagged in 30 raunchy photos involving marshmallow fluff and the back end of a horse costume.

How To Recover: Un-tag yourself ASAP, then send out messages to the friends who posted the pictures, telling them calmly but firmly that you’d prefer the evidence of Halloween debauchery stay offline. If they won’t remove them, well, you have 365 days before next Halloween to make some new friends who understand the word “discretion.”

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