I’m adding this one to my list of favorite eBay auctions along with the fart in a jar and the antique anti-masturbation device. Brandon Tudor of Illinois was auctioning off bird poop that resembled Michael Jackson. When a bird shat on his windshield, Brandon claims the likeness to the late po(o)p star became obvious “after it hardened.” The full listing reads:
“Everybody has potato chips or burned crust images of the Virgin Mary… But only you will have your very own bird shat image of Michael Jackson!!! A bird pooped Michael Jackson on the windshield of my car. -Your purchase will include full windshield including bird poop image. -Are you a collector of rare and unique things? -Are you obsessed with Michael Jackson and want that unique piece no other collector will ever have? -Does his spirit live on? -The questions are endless… -Don’t get out bid on this one of a kind collectors piece!!!”
Unfortunately, no one bid on this collectors’ piece and the auction was closed. I guess people didn’t want to pay $500 for a shit smear, no matter what or whom it resembled. But it really does look like MJ! You can become a fan of the one-of-a-kind poop on Facebook. Obviously, I have. I’m hopeful that Brandon will reopen the auction with a lower starting bid this time.