Truly “Miss Advised”: Julia Allison Gives A Second Date Blow Job, Gets Dumped

Before I get into parsing the insanity of “Miss Advised”‘s penultimate episode, a note about Emily Morse. Last night, as I was livetweeting all the action — I am so dedicated, y’all — I noted that I use Emily’s scenes as time to refill my drink (multiple are necessary to get through this shitshow) or pee. Emily herself replied to me, not understanding why. I explained that she is awesome and rad and normal and unless she shares scenes with someone not awesome and rad and normal (like Alan Busey), I simply do not find her entertaining enough to watch (or blog about, save this wee paragraph), and that is the biggest compliment I can give. Really, “Miss Advised” is a dating show about two mental cases and an adorable pocket person. Love the adorable pocket person, just not enough to waste much valuable blog space on. Anyway … shall we begin?

Perhaps that’s because the moment Julia arrived at JellyD’s apartment and began “the talk,” he immediately put the smack down. I would call it a breakup, except it’s not because this relationship didn’t exist in the first place — not for a month, let alone three. Seriously, Julia should try devoting half as much time to her Elle column as she does towards constructing fake narratives about her love life.

Next week! The last episode! Probably forever, because who would renew this shit!