An Open Letter To Kim Kardashian: Are They Pants? Are They Boots? Are They Pant-boots?

Kim, you look great in this cape and Lestat blouse! It’s awesome! You might even be wearing less makeup these days! Probably not though. I have one serious, serious conundrum, though, and that is pant-boots. Are these pant-boots, like you had on the other day? Is it pants, tucked into open-toed boots? Why do open-toed boots exist? Where are you getting all of these pant-boots? Is there a store for that? Is it DW Kanye West? Is Kanye enabling this? Worse still, is he encouraging it? Is a line of pant-boots your next business venture? … Hey, don’t get any ideas. Pant-boots are not, and never will be, a thing. I hope. But then again, I also said the same thing about you. You see how that turned out.