What’s The Going Rate For The Tooth Fairy These Days?

This weekend, I called my sister to rehash my love life. 

Suddenly I could hear her turning to a small child in the background. “Do you want to tell Aunt Jessie the big news?” she asked. “No!” My five-year-old niece M. replied. 

“Tell me, what’s the big news?” I asked my sister, wondering what constitutes “big news” in kindergarten. 

“M. lost her first tooth!” my sister said. “The tooth fairy left five dollars last night.” 

“FIVE DOLLARS?!?!” I shouted into the phone. 

To be fair, it was M.’s first lost tooth. Perhaps the Tooth Fairy got overzealous. But still. Is this just inflation in action or was I seriously gipped back in the late ’80s?

Back in the day, I think the Tooth Fairy left me a quarter per tooth or maybe a few quarters, if I was lucky. On one special occasion, she left a present under my pillow (a book of poems) after I’d had a tooth pulled out at the dentist’s office using Novocaine. But, no, I never acquired enough cash losing my teeth to wander away from “Sesame Street” and buy myself a latte.

My sister suggested the Tooth Fairy might be less generous going forward, but who knows. Now there’s a precedent to follow. Which reminds me, BRB, off to knock out some of my own teeth.

Am I just miserly and old? Or is $5-per-tooth the going rate these days? Parents of small drippy children who occasionally bleed from their mouths, please let us know in the comments.

Contact the author of this post at [email protected] Follow me on Twitter at @JessicaWakeman. 

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