Karl Lagerfeld Hates Massages, Is Surprisingly In The Know About Hollywood Scandal

Karl Lagerfeld is known as much for making bizarre and inflammatory comments as he is for designing clothing. Let’s recap: Adele is a little too fat for his liking. He loves Dominique Strauss-Kahn. He doesn’t tolerate ugly children. He only likes high-class escorts, and doesn’t like sleeping with people he really loves. He thinks the only people who take issue with thin models are “fat mummies.” Perhaps best of all, he claims that Coco Chanel was “never a feminist because [she] wasn’t ugly enough for that.” Seriously. To be frank, I like to think of Karl as a caricature of sorts who can never really be taken all that seriously in any context aside from fashion. He is, after all, the Kaiser, and the Kaiser’s gonna say what he damn well pleases.

That said, the man is often inadvertently hilarious — or maybe it just seems inadvertent? New York did some catching up with Karl in Cannes last week at the amfAR Cinema Against AIDS, and in light of Harvey Weinstein auctioning off a massage by Heidi Klum at the gala (with or without her consent, we’re not certain), the mag asked the revered designer about his own take on massages. He said, “I hate massage and I don’t believe in massage. I hate to be touched.” Well, that’s fine. When asked if there was anyone he’d like to give a massage to, he replied, “No, I’m not John Travolta.” Meow — Karl, your fangs are showing! Again. [Fashionista]