8 “Real Housewives” Spin-Offs We’d Totally Watch

Being a “Real Housewife” on Bravo opens the door to many career opportunities — starting a clothing/makeup/jewelry/sex toy/cookbook line, auditioning for “Celebrity Apprentice,” recording a God-awful single or, best-case scenario, landing a spinoff show. In addition to the show dedicated to exploring funny cat memes (WTF? I can’t even … NO!! ), Bravo has green lit two new “Real Housewives” spinoffs for its 2013 season. One, tentatively titled “SUR,” follows “RHOBH” star Lisa Vanderpump as she opens a new restaurant. The other, “The Kandi Factory,” features Atlanta “Real Housewife” Kandi Burruss as she works with aspiring music stars. Meh. We have some better pitches for Andy Cohen and the gang … [The Wrap]

1. “Six Feet Phaedra.” This show follows Phaedra Parks as she undertakes her new career as a funeral director and maintains a part-time law practice where she represents strippers like Ridiculous.

2. “Albie’s All Alone.” Albie Manzo seems like he should be the ideal NYC bachelor. But he’s striking out with the ladies. He needs help. This show is Bravo’s answer to “The Bachelor”. We watch as Albie works with dating coaches, stylists, and a therapist to receive the help he needs to find Mrs. Right.

3. “Who ‘Gon Check Me Boo?” Sheree Whitfield is a bitch who hangs out with gay guys. That’s it.

4. “Joe’s Juice.” Joe Gorga opens a juice shop for juice heads on the Jersey Shore. Sometimes he cross-dresses for fun. His wife Melissa performs at the juice shop with her niece Gia and her sister-in-law Teresa Giudice gets jealous of their bond.

5. “Staub’s Angels.” We watch as Danielle Staub opens an all lesbian strip club in New Jersey. Her daughters are her business partners and confidantes.

6. “New Jersey/New York Challenge.” The casts of “RHONY” and “RHONJ” face off in a “Real World/Road Rules”-type competition, which includes challenges like table flipping and hanging clothes on wire hangers.

7. “Stomping With Singer.” Ramona Singer buys a vineyard in Long Island and we watch as she learns the ins and outs of the wine industry. And yes, we’ll see her drunk and stomping grapes.

8. “What Would Alexis Do?” Alexis Bellino hosts this talk show. She gives advice on everything from how to find a good plastic surgeon to how to be an upright Christian wife all while wearing Alexis Couture.