In a recent Dear Prudence column, a woman wrote in, concerned about her fiancé’s aversion to her scent. She wrote:
“Last night, a bit too much wine prompted my fiancé to tell me a secret he’s been keeping for years: He thinks I smell bad. And that’s why our sex life has been on the decline. I know I do sweat more than some people, but I shower daily and always use deodorant. I can’t figure out if I am actually as bad as he says or if he just thinks I’m stinky because he is lucky enough to have totally odorless sweat. I am seriously considering calling off the wedding because of this.”
Prudence advises her to seek medical evaluation for her odor, adding, “If you feel your fiancé told you in a cruel or malicious way, or you think he is establishing the groundwork for breaking up with you, then you need to engage in a frank discussion about where your romance is headed.”
I realize that everyone might not feel as strongly as me, but if I were this woman, I would be out of there so fast. As a scentophile, this is just about the worst thing I can imagine a fiancé saying to me. I’m wondering how it took this man until the engagement phase to notice his woman’s body odor. I have a nose like a wolf, and someone’s odor is the pretty much the first thing I notice about them. As a friend of mine once said, “Chemistry basically comes down to whether or not you like the way a person’a armpit smells or saliva tastes.” Sounds unsavory when put that way, but it’s true. I find myself unable to be totally attracted to someone whose taste or smell is off to me. And that’s not to say that he has to smell conventionally good — all slathered in cologne and deodorant and crap (there have been men with B.O. that I’ve absolutely adored), I just have to enjoy a man’s natural smell. And he should enjoy mine as well.
Am I just a weird wolf woman? Or would you get out of this relationship too? Share your thoughts in the comments.