Thoughts From Guys On Our IM: What Do Men Think About Valentine’s Day?

Confession? I love Valentine’s Day. I know it’s not cool to admit, but I’m a big soppy romantic at heart. Any day devoted to chocolates, flowers and other showy displays of l’amour is okay by me. (And even if I’ve been single on V-Day, my dad has always sent me a box of chocolate in the mail!) This year my dude has been warning me to keep my expectations low, which I guess means we’re taking a hot air balloon ride instead of a private jet to Mustique? I know I am alone in my Valentine’s Day love … so I chatted with some of the dudes on my IM to plumb the depths of their hatred.

Frisky Commenter LR52185, 27: 

Valentine’s Day: yay or nay?

I could care less about Valentine’s Day! And it’s not just that I’m currently single, it has to do with the fact that I don’t think I should treat a lady any different on Feb 14 as I would on Feb 13 or any other day of the year. If I like you, shouldn’t I be doing these things randomly throughout the year and not just when society makes us feel like I should?

You’ve never done anything special for Valetine’s Day? Really?

Well, I professionally recorded a song for a long-term girlfriend — I wrote and performed it for her live on Christmas — and gave it to her on a mix cd. So it was really more a continuation to the Christmas gift that happened to work out.

So what are you doing this year?

I generally go out with both male and female friends to a party at a cool Irish pub downtown.

Finance Guy, 33:

Valentine’s Day: yay or nay?

Valentine’s Day is the most crap-filled holiday ever. I hate it and have always hated it. I hate everything about it.  Now maybe, last year when I was a little less bitter I would have been romantic and said I loved it, but the bottom line is I am tired of spending my hard-earned dollars on useless shit. I already spend them for girls on Christmas, her birthday, Halloween [Jessica’s Note: Halloween?!], anniversary of the first date, anniversary of the first kiss [Jessica’s Note: What!?], random gift here and there, movies, dinners!  I wish women would be more appreciative and say “Every day is Valentine’s Day to me.”

No, you don’t sound bitter at all.  So, you just ignore the whole day then?

No, I normally do something nice on Valentine’s Day if I am in a relationship, just like dinner and flowers.  I do it so my girlfriend doesn’t feel left out. I am a bastard but I still want her to feel special and have something to tell her friends.

The Swing Dancer, 28 

Valentine’s Day: yay or nay?

I’m interested because it’s an opportunity to be romantic and I think it’s nice to do that for my partner. I don’t actually know if my partner is interested in it. 

So how do you decide how to celebrate? 

I don’t think there’s a universal standard.  What’s romantic for one couple is over the top or cheesy to another.  I’ll probably do something small like flowers or make dinner.

What do you think about men who propose on Valentine’s Day?

Honestly, I think there are better opportunities to propose.

An Imagined Conversation With Jessica’s Boyfriend, 34

Baby, I know they don’t celebrate Valentine’s Day in France, but it’s kind of a big deal for women here and I just want to make sure you know that.

Oh, don’t worry, ma petite choupette. I have it covered.

Ooh, can I have a hint?

Well, I know you like chocolate …

I’m listening …

And anything from Kate Spade …

Yes …

And I thought I’d ask Michael Fassbender to orally pleasure you for a few hours …

How generous of you …

And there’s one more thing …

What? What? Tell me!

Well did you see that viral video of Kristen Bell freaking out over a sloth?


The Actual Conversation With Jessica’s Boyfriend, 34

Valentine’s Day: yay or nay?

Never, it’s not big in Europe. It’s actually a relief to be single on Valentine’s Day. No big expectation to live up to. I never made a huge effort. The most I did was take her to a restaurant I liked. It’s only after I realized we should have gone to one she liked.

So what have you usually done on it?

Nothing! I’m bummed out if Valentine’s Day is on a weekend and my guy friends have to spend it with their girlfriend.

So basically we’re just celebrating this because of me.

I’m concerned of not living up to your expectations. I think it’s an unnecessary strain, this build-up one never lives up to because you gorge on rich foods and wine and then have lousy sex.

Well, not with that attitude! Have you ever had a girl get upset at you for not celebrating it the way she wanted you to?  

Not yet, maybe next week.

Contact the author of this post at [email protected] Follow me on Twitter at @JessicaWakeman.