Is He Falling Asleep After Sex To Avoid Commitment Talk? Research Says Yes
You just enjoyed some great sexytime with a guy you’re really, really into. He isn’t hurriedly getting dressed and running out of the door while making embarrassed excuses. Instead, he is soundly asleep next to you, as quiet and comfortable as a baby. Perhaps he is even holding you in his arms. Does this mean that he will stick around in the long-run? Eh, actually, Michigan researchers believe that men may fall asleep after sex to avoid commitment talks, but don’t worry ladies — they’re only doing it for us!
“If men actively avoid commitment promises in post-coital conversation, this could increase the likelihood of women ending the [relationship] due to perceptions of undesirable partner characteristics and/or uncertainty about the future of the relationship,” the researchers wrote. “Hastening sleep onset may evade this adverse effect.”
In other words, he does avoid talking to you about the status of your relationship by hitting they hay post-hurrah, but only because he doesn’t want you to feel uncertain about your future together if he doesn’t have all of the right answers right away.
And he is not the only one doing it. Researchers also suggested that women fall asleep before their partners as a “non-conscious mechanism” to dodge conversations about commitment that could lead them to view their partner in a “bad light,” i.e. unreliable or unready to commit.
So. let the lazy beast catch his post-coital snooze. Chatting or worrying about the future of a relationship is better done in the waking hours anyways. [New Paltz.edu (PDF)]