Science is a beautiful thing. Science has brought us many technological advancements, such as and including, air travel, tanning beds and mini-pizzas. But there are many things that science has yet to deliver on. And that’s got us kind of mad with science. We kind of want to have some words with science, okay? In the meantime, we’ll settle for assembling an incomplete list of all the things that we wish science would just get to working on, already. This list is by no means exhaustive, so feel free to include your own special requests in the comments.
- Perma-kittens and puppies that stay tiny and furry and squishable forever.
BEAUTY AND FASHION
- A real-deal serum that would allow you to take back the mistakes of the ’90s and let your eyebrows grow back in.
- Chip-less nail polish. Like, literally, WILL NOT CHIP.
- Shampoo that prevents your hair from getting greasy for a full week.
- A substance for the soles of your shoes so that the heels of your shoes really, really actually don’t wear down.
- A razor that shaves your legs for you.
- Lipstick that regenerates itself after it’s worn off
- Self-cleaning shoes, as in they shed an outer layer of “dirty” skin.
- A treatment that actually removes cellulite forever.
- The perfect bra. Cute, supportive, comfortable, changes color and shape based on your outfit needs.
- A waterproof laptop computer so we could multitask while in the bath and shower.
- A pen that turns your thoughts into one long, run on document and stores it on a hard drive, even when you’re sleeping.
- A smart pod that figures out your favorite music and downloads it automatically.
- Meal pills that allow you to taste your food, but not have to waste time preparing it or chewing it.
- Sheets that change color when its time to wash them — like they go from blue to green, so you know it’s been two weeks or whatever.
- A Snuggli for coffee, so you don’t have to juggle it in your hands when you’re carrying a lot of bags.
- A heat bubble. Like a personal heat-lamp for walking in the cold.
- A lube applicator, maybe in glove form?