Science Can Now Turn Your Brown Eyes Blue — Permanently

Science, man. It’s a mystery. It seems that lately, science — rather than focusing on curing diseases or solving impending environmental disasters — has taken it upon itself to address an age-old problem: people with brown eyes. Yes, yes, some of you may in fact suffer from this affliction, but worry no more. A scientific solution is upon us!

A doctor in California has created a laser that will change the color of your eyes in 20 seconds or less! Dr. Greg Homer explains, “You sit in front of what look like giant binoculars and watch a 20-second animation as a computer-guided laser breaks down their brown pigment. You won’t feel anything. Your eyes will get a little darker for the first week. Then in two to four weeks, they’ll be completely changed.” Apparently all brown-eyed people have a blue-looking eye orb underneath the brown pigment of their eyes. So it’s just a matter of zapping out the brown stuff. He’s already apparently successfully treated 12 people in Mexico, making the comparisons between Homer and “The Simpsons” Dr. Nick character almost complete.

As someone who was born with naturally blue eyes — or “Jew Blues” as my friend Heidi calls them — I don’t see what the fuss is all about. Blue eyes don’t handle sunlight nearly as well, and while they are totally goooooorgeous, brown eyes (and green! and hazel!) are perfectly great as well.

So tell us: would you switch your eye color if you could? [NY Daily News]