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5 Easy Steps For Hooking Up On Halloween

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This is an oldie but a goodie from our girl Simcha. — Editor

Valentine’s Day may be for couples in love, but Halloween is for singles looking to mingle! (Hey, pagans knew how to party.) You definitely don’t want to miss your chance at action so sweet you’ll want to bag it up and give it all away! So, how do you get it done on this hot holiday? Here are five easy steps for hooking up on Halloween…

STEP #1: WEAR A COSTUME

This is obvious. The more skin you show, the better, but if you want to play it funny or scary, that’s totally fine too. Anyone who works in the media can tell you, niche markets are the best ones to be in. So pick a good costume that truly represents your fantasy. All the better if it’s something that someone would be proud to say they got with. For example: “Last night, I took Jessica Rabbit home to my briar patch, you know what I’m sayin’?”

TIP: Keep your props to a minimum. After all, you want your hands free. When I was Dolly Parton, I carried around a microphone as a joke. Sadly, I totally ruined it when I dropped the mic into my drink while I was making out with a Donnie Darko. Sigh…of course, he was worth the cost of replacing it!

STEP #2: TALK TO EVERYONE YOU’RE ATTRACTED TO

Halloween is the easiest night to start a conversation with someone. Simply tell them you like their costume. Ripping it off them could be just around the corner.

TIP: Sometimes, with guy costumes, it’s hard to tell under the mask or the gore, just how hot they are. This is where #1 really comes in. Be attracted to the person they want to be….and then try to get a close look at them in some light! Once, I accidentally made out with a Slash from Guns ‘N’ Roses, until I realized he was probably older than the real one. Thanks to a bright bulb in a closet, I found out before things got too hairy!

STEP#3: ZERO IN

You’re dressed like Blair from “Gossip Girl” and you spot a Chuck. Now is your big chance! You have to get them alone and away from their friends and the crazy scene. Ask them if they want to grab another drink at the bar with you. That will give you some one-on-one time and get you tipsier. That’s what we call a win-win situation.

TIP: If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again! I once fell for a guy dressed up like a slice of pizza, but he wasn’t interested in me, even after a couple drinks. So, I moved on to an Eminem. Five minutes later, he was melting in my mouth! You can always trade players on Halloween. That’s why people go incognito!

STEP #4: PUT IT OUT THERE

Send him the signal that all systems are GO! Be flirty. Tug on his costume. Grind like you’re Baby in “Dirty Dancing.” Despite all the distractions, pay attention to him. And again, if you feel a little claustrophobic at the crowded party, take breather together. Be sure to make it as easy for him as you are. And if you’re a risk taker, make the first move. Halloween is one of the craziest social nights of the year, so you’ll have to work a little harder to keep someone’s attention — or have someone keep yours.

TIP: I was at a rad loft party when I met a recent Russian immigrant dressed like Kurt Cobain. The hair was his, so hot! But he didn’t speak a lot of English, which muted my charms. Instead I flashed a cigarette, the international signal for “let’s make out,” and after one puff, he was taking my breath away.

STEP #5: MOVIN’ ON UP

So, there’s a fiesta in your pants and you want to invite your new masked man. Even though you’re in costume, don’t think people can’t tell that you’re trying to put all the h-o in Halloween. You are dressed to attract attention and that’s what you’re doing, especially if you’re getting freaky. So, just be aware you’re performing and don’t do anything in public that you’ll mind being caught on camera.

TIP: Even if your friends are fully aware that you snuck out with a dude, at least you were classy enough not to rub it in their faces — save all the rubbing for your fling! Plus, if you go somewhere private, no one can get potentially embarrassing photos of you. Luckily, I don’t have a Halloween internet scandal to recount … yet.

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