The Good, The Bad & The WTF: Who Won The Money On “Bachelor Pad”

Last night’s season finale of “Bachelor Pad” was kind of like McDonald’s Supersize French Fries—it was three hours long, loaded with salt, and left me feeling kind of woozy after I devoured it. So, were Kasey and Vienna able to strong-arm themselves into the win? Did Holly gravitate back toward Michael or stay fixated on Blake? How does Ella’s new face look? And who won the freaking money? Find out after the jump as I recap the good, bad, and WTF moments of last night. The Good:

  • The Cirque du Soleil challenge. I love that to make it to the final, the partners had to do a routine while dangling 100 feet in the air by a harness. It looked fun and totally terrifying at the same time.
  • The various shots of the partners practicing.They all had a different method—standing, up, lying on the floor, etc. So goofy.
  • Roberto carrying Ali Fedotowsky in. I’m glad these two are still together, and that they were brought in to judge the challenge.
  • Michael and Holly’s routine. My goodness, Michael was totally awesome at this challenge from second one. Even though Holly wasn’t so hot, she took some risks and let him do crazy lifts with her. Thank goodness they edged out Kasey and Vienna who similarly rocked at the challenge.
  • Michael and Holly pick Graham and Michelle for the finale. Even though the editing and their deliberations totally made it look like they were going to pick Vienna and Kasey to guarantee themselves the audience’s vote, they did the right thing and voted for their friends.
  • Gia’s bangs. On the “Tell All” segment of the show, I couldn’t stop looking at them. So cute.
  • Justin chastises everyone for not voting off Vienna and Kasey earlier. Amen, dude. William also made the keen observation that Vienna and Kasey didn’t actually win any challenges and made it through off others trying to appease them by giving them roses.
  • Kasey seems remorseful about his behavior on the show. He not only apologized to Jake for saying he wanted to punch him but he admitted, “I made a fool of myself. I don’t see Kasey in the footage. It’s heartbreaking.”
  • Melissa reacts to Blake’s infamous line while kissing her. It looked like it might have been the first time she heard Blake say, “I don’t want any part of Melissa. I’m like a prostitute whoring it out.” I’m glad she called him on it. And admitted that she should never go on reality TV ever again.
  • Blake’s interview. He said, “I am madly in love with Holly” and revealed that she is moving to South Carolina to be with him. And, gasp, the show aired him proposing to Holly on a mountaintop. I know I’ve been Team Michael all season, but I am happy that these two have had such a whirlwind romance, even if I have doubts about whether it will last.
  • Graham’s bow tie. Would almost be enough for me to vote for him and Michelle.
  • The cast votes Holly and Michael as the winners. Which I totally approve of, given that they won an awful lot of challenges, mostly thanks to Michael.
  • Michael and Holly are given the choice to share their money or keep it for themselves. For a brief second, I wanted Michael to keep the money. He is the one who won the challenges and the one who had to watch his ex-fiance fall in love with another guy over the course of the season. But I’m glad that he didn’t and opted to share the $250K with Holly. Because he is a stand-up guy.
  • The introduction of Ben as the new “Bachelor.” He looked kind of sexy tending his vineyard while David Gray plays in the background.

The Bad:

  • Kasey and Vienna prepping for the Cirque du Soleil challenge. I hate the way she says “good.” Not to mention that Kasey thinks he is going to win because he is “witty.” What does that have to do with this challenge? And his idea to make a heart at the end of their routine? So lame.
  • Boring Trista Rehn and jerky Jason Mesnick are the other two judges for the challenge. Get the theme? It’s people who actually found love on the show.
  • Kirk and Ella totally suck at the challenge and are sent home. Sad given that they both had compelling reasons for wanting to win, even if Ella called hers into question last week. In the limo, she said, “A rose would have bought me and my son a house. I feel I threw it away on fear.” Sigh.
  • Ames explains why he broke up with Jackie. In the “Tell-All” hour, Jackie said, “My heart was certainly broken. There was a week where I couldn’t even face the day.” Ames responds, “When I left the show, I thought she was the one> But I started to learn that we are very different people. I thought it was right to say so sooner.” Which I believe is honest, but sucks.
  • Vienna and Kasey lament how hard it is to be judged for their fights. They really need to watch the things they say to each other—they both make very low blows when they are angry. I’m glad other cast members pointed out how unhealthy this is.
  • Michelle’s fugly dress. Why the sparkly camouflage?
  • Chris Harrison tells Michael that Blake and Holly are engaged. This was so sad to me, the idea of blindsiding him with this news as he is about to compete for the grand prize. Michael was so right to ask why Holly didn’t tell him before. This was all sorts of wrong. And yet Michael was so gracious, saying, “I just want Holly to be happy. We care for each other even though its hard.”
  • Michelle’s dad died. Oh man, I feel terrible for her.
  • The BS question and answer period. In which both couples say they don’t feel deserving of the money, how much their partner means to them, that they’ll do great things with it, etc. Just vote.

The WTF:

  • Vienna’s idiotic lamentation. As she and Kasey are voted off, she says, “I’m upset that my perfect rose record is broken.” Glad you’re focused on what matters, Vienna.
  • Ella’s new face. At the “Tell-All” special I just couldn’t stop staring at her. Why, oh why, did she get plastic surgery? Her face was so beautiful before. She is one of those girls who needs a peaked nose to balance her face. Without it, she looks so strange.
  • Erica’s lips. Speaking of bad plastic surgery done by Erica Rose’s dad, her lips look like skin stretched far too tautly over a tire.
  • Vienna thinks she was wasn’t nasty to Jake on the show. She says she felt “closure” with Jake. And, uh, that’s why she was freaking out about his presence all season? And she claims she forgave him early on in the show and didn’t try to turn the rest of the contestants against him? She is either a really good actress or totally delusional. I’m not saying that I think Jake is a super genuine guy. But Vienna’s behavior hear makes me question if he is really the “monster” she claimed.

What did you think of this season of “Bachelor Pad?”

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