Three day weekends are amazing. And also, a little disorienting. Last night, I went about my merry way thinking it was Sunday until about 11 p.m., when I remembered that it was actually Monday and “Bachelor Pad” was already in progress. I stayed up late to watch the whole thing and, boy, was I happy that I did. Finally, some movement on the Blake-Holly-Michael love triangle! And a little more action in the Michelle/Graham department!
After the jump, the good, bad, and WTF moments from last night’s episode. Of course, there is a lot more under “Bad” and “WTF” than “Good.” But that’s just how “Bachelor Pad” goes. The Good:
- Everyone realizes Blake is a slimeball. The guys unanimously voted for him as the person they couldn’t stand in the house during “The Nearlywed Game.” And the girls had a conversation, with Holly in their midst, about how they think he’s shady. I have to agree. While I do think he authentically likes Holly, he strikes me as a less-nasty version of Wes or Bentley, who went on “The Bachelorette” for notoriety more than anything. And I just don’t want that to be rewarded.
- Ella misusing the term “sexual tension.” She says this is why Kasey and Vienna are fighting. Yes, they are bickering about sex. But sexual tension is a very different thing.
- Kasey admits it’s tough dating Vienna. Hear you, bro.
- Michelle and Graham heat up. They were so sweet on their date, not to mention so sexy as they made out in the pool. “I couldn’t be happier,” Graham said of their date. “I’d love to have Michelle as a part of my life for a very long time.” Aww.
- Holly’s comment on why she worried about Blake going out with Erica Rose. “He’s a man and she’s persistent.” And seriously, was she ever. Erica’s whole attempted seduction of Blake was 10 steps beyond pathetic.
- Blake doesn’t give in. Thank goodness. I would have zero respect for him if he had.
- Michael leaves the deciding vote to Holly. By the time Michael and Holly got to vote, everyone knew it was between Blake/Erica and Kirk/Ella. For Michael, the decision is easy—he wants Blake, his main competitor for Holly’s affection, gone. For Holly, it’s tougher because she has to choose between Blake, her love interest, and Ella, her good friend. I liked that Michael ultimately left the decision up to her, instead of demanding that she vote for Blake.
- In the end, Holly votes off Blake. Way not to vote with your hormones, Holly! And to avoid further complicating your relationship with your ex-fiance. Blake and Erica both needed to go. If Blake is for real about you and it’s meant to be, it will happen down the road.
- The drama-baiting questions during the challenge. The point of “The Nearlywed Game” was to ask contestants totally uncomfortable questions like, “Who is better in bed—you or your partner?” (why, oh why, did we not see Vienna and Kasey’s answer on that one) and “Who here does your partner most want to sleep with?”
- Holly answering that last question with “Blake.” While Michael wrote down “Me/Michael,” because he just couldn’t name another guy.
- Michelle and Graham rocked the game, even though they barely know each other. I’d figured out before Graham said that he lost his virginity at age 7 that they were giving the same answer for every numerical question. Pretty clever, those two! And I loved that Vienna and Kasey, the only long-term couple in the house, did so poorly.
- Kasey and Vienna’s weekly fight. Out of nowhere, Vienna busted into the living room, freaking out since Kasey had “ripped the ring off my finger” because she wouldn’t have sex with him. Right, because involving everyone else in your negotiations about sex is always the answer! As Kasey and Vienna talk in private, Kasey makes a low blow, referencing Wes and David Good—two guys Vienna apparently did have sex with. He needs to watch saying things like that when he’s angry. Sometimes you can’t take those things back.
- Michelle and Graham’s date becomes an ad for “What’s Your Number?” Did they really have to talk about how “relatable” the movie was for them?
- Erica Rose trying to seduce Blake. As I mentioned before, she was so gross about it, showing off the lingerie she was bringing on their over-night date to the other girls and saying things like, “I’m really horny. I hope I end up in the missionary position.”
- Blake tells Erica he’s worried about looking wishy-washy, rather than saying, “I’m not interested in you.” It took him an hour to outright say no to her advances. When he pointed out that she was being mighty presumptuous, she just didn’t get the point. She explained, “Blake says telling the girls I was bringing sexy lingerie is the same as him telling the guys he was bringing condoms. I agree. I wish he had.” Hand-palm.
- Blake and Erica have safety roses to gift to another couple and piss them away on Vienna and Kasey. Idiots. Just, idiots.
- During “The Newlywed Game,” Vienna says she waits 22 dates before sex. Yeah, right. Also, I am skeptical of Holly’s claim that she and Michael went on 32 dates before they boned. I mean, who counts that high?
- Kasey saying Vienna’s exes most likely miss her “teeth.” Yep, that’s totally why Jake is all torn up over their breakup.
- Erica communicates with ghosts. And apparently consulted an astrologer by the name of Herb about what would happen on “Bachelor Pad”?
- Vienna’s “I Got A Rose” song and dance. Vom. Also, I love that a second later, she criticizes Ella for harping on why she needs the money in the end. “Each of us has a story,” says Vienna. “I’m not gonna say that my mom’s four months behind on rent and I have an 11-year-old sister who lives with her.” Only, you just did.