Ask The Man Panel: Jeffrey Campbell Cut-Out Wedges

These Jeffrey Campbell wedges defy the laws of physics and gravity and all that is right in the world, but apparently that doesn’t matter: even at $200 a pop, they’re sold out. Judging from the enthusiastic reviews, they’re a hit with female customers, but we were curious about what the Man Panel would think of such a strange little shoe. Their candid reactions after the jump… Vinnie, 29: It does look oddly similar to a track I built with a jump for my Hot Wheels cars when I was 8. I bet it’s great for hot climates and mild floods.

Alec, 26: The things they can do with CGI these days…

Pat, 26: I have no witty comments or jokes about these shoes. When I look at these shoes, I actually feel a sense of dread and concern for the well-being of feet everywhere.

Devin, 21: The missing piece was eventually found, having grown larger and more sinister since bursting from center of this shoe. Luckily Sigourney Weaver was able to destroy it before anyone could try to wear it.

Nick, 25: Is this, like, a magic trick that instantly makes half of your foot disappear? Cool! Oh wait, I get it now. Nevermind, not nearly as cool. More uncomfortable looking, I would say.

Cory, 24: This shoe looks like it’s inviting a scorpion or other deadly insect to crawl into the open bottom while you are patiently waiting at the ATM outside the bank. It would certainly make you rue the day you bought these ridiculous heels by stinging the most sensitive part of your foot until you collapse in swollen agony.

Damien, 34: That is an adorable shoe-shaped hammer mold. Is the tiny forge sold separately?