Evening Quickies: Just Kidding, Brangelina Isn’t Getting Hitched!

  • Rumors (in Us Weekly, left) that Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt are planning to marry in the coming months are false, sources tell People. (See, I told you, Amelia!) [Whatever. — Editor] They should just poop out another baby and give the American public another distraction. [People]
  • Lots of people send Casey Anthony money in jail, apparently. Then she goes on wild jailhouse canteen shopping sprees for ponytail holders and jalapeno nacho cheese dip. [Village Voice]
  • Lea Michele, Chris Colfer and Cory Monteith are all leaving “Glee” when their characters — who are seniors — graduate at the end of the fall season, says the show’s creator Ryan Murphy. At least someone learned a lesson from the nightmare that was “That ’70s Show.” [The Hollywood Reporter]
  • Have you ever had your “ponytail” waxed? Yeah, not that ponytail, honey. [xoJane]

  • “File “John Carter” under: terrible movies we will watch just for the hot dudes. In this case, Taylor Kitsch. [BuzzFeed]
  • Baby #2 is on the way for Pam and Jim on “The Office.” [NYmag.com Vulture]
  • Kal Penn — that would be Kumar from “Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle” — is leaving his job at the White House to join “How I Met Your Mother.” Kal Penn gets to be one of those kids who says they want to grow up and be an astronaut and a baseball player. [TV Line]
  • Crisis averted: Nikki Blonsky from “Hairspray” and “Huge,” is not leaving acting to work at a shoe store. She was only working at a friend’s boutique for a day “to see what it was like.” Aww, what adorable things rich people do! [Twitter.com/NikkiBlonsky]
  • Intern for Pauly D’s clothing line, Dirty Couture, must submit a head shot with application. No grenades, bro. [Fashionista]
  • Jill Zarin is trying to make a “Real Housewives of London” series happen with Robbie Williams’ wife, who lives there. I guess she didn’t get the memo that Bravo isn’t interested in doing more “Housewives” series after Miami and D.C. bombed. [ONTD]
  • How to date a Muggle: a guide for wizards. [How About We]
  • That girl in pink who dances around awkwardly in Rebecca Black’s “Friday” video has a name. Her name is Bennett “Benni” Cinkle, she is 14, and has a “momager.” [The Hairpin]

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