The Good, The Bad & The WTF: “Mob Wives” Reunion Special

Mob Wives” is back for season two this fall. Yesssss! In the meantime, last night’s scream-fest reunion episode will have to tide us over. After the jump—the good, the bad, and the head-scratching moments. (Also, SPOILERS!)The Good:

  • No fist fights! This has to be a first in reunion special history.
  • Carla dumped her “grabby” boyfriend. Whole episodes of “Mob Wives” have been devoted to where Carla’s boyfriend has grabbed the different women — boobs, butt, or the secret lady-cavern — after he’s had a few drinks. Carla was always, like, “It’s OK, I’m cool with it!” Duh, everyone’s boyfriend violates other women’s private parts, right? I was thisclose to stuffing Carla in a potato sack and dragging her to Feminist Re-Education Camp. But last night Carla said that she dumped the guy, although she wouldn’t reveal why. I can only hope it is because she came to her senses that he’s a disrespectful douche.
  • Reneé dumped her ex-husband once and for all. Reneé’s ex-husband Junior freeloaded off her for most of season one, stopping by her house for homemade chicken soup and even sleeping in her bed. Reneé justified her feelings for her headed-to-the-big-house ex-hubby by insisting he is “my son’s father!” Her son, by the way, looks to be about 17 years old and not exactly in need of his daddy playing Tinker Toys with him anymore. Towards the end of season one, Reneé found text messages from random chicks on Junior’s cell phone and sent him packing. On last night’s reunion special, she said that she’s over Junior and is actually dating someone else. Oh, Reneé, I am so proud of you.

The Good, The Bad & The WTF: Saying Goodbye To The “Mob Wives” For Now

The Bad:

  • The screaming. Oh, the screaming. So much screaming. The “never before seen” footage from Drita and Karen’s rooftop bar hair-pull-a-palooza was, like, five straight minutes of screaming the word “ho.” My roommate’s cat hid under the couch for a good hour afterwards.
  • Drita’s sourpuss mug. Drita looked like she was sucking on a lemon the entire episode. Wow, she must have been really pissed about being stuck in the same room with Karen. Anyway, I found her non-stop grimace distracting.
  • Karen and Drita continue to bicker about s**t that happened 11 years ago without actually explaining what really happened. Karen slept with Drita’s boyfriend? And Drita starting dated Karen’s ex? And they were friends still? Or they weren’t? Or something? It’s all so confusing and complicated. It’d be easier for me to pick a side if I had a clue about exactly why they were fighting.

Quiz: Are You “Mob Wives” Or “Basketball Wives” Material?

The WTF:

  • The mob wives’ denial that they are making Staten Island look bad. Yes, and Seaside Heights is proud of their place in cultural history as well.
  • Reneé’s rundown of all her plastic surgery. Call me old-fashioned, but I feel like tummy tucks, nose jobs and breast reductions should be private. Or at least not something you brag about on national television.
  • So many friendships ruined over unworthy dudes. Carla would rather call Reneé a “liar” than admit her boyfriend groped her friend. Karen and Drita would rather fight over Lee — who cheated on Drita while they were married and whom Karen cheated on while they dated — than admit he’s not such a good boyfriend or husband. Really, ladies. Are these guys — guys who are in prison, for Chrissakes — really worth fighting with your female friends over?

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