The Lohan Defense: Kombucha Tea & 7 Other Things You Should Avoid Before A Drug Test

Lindsay Lohan has evaded yet another probation violation for failing a routine alcohol test. Perhaps the judge believed Lindsay’s claims that Komboucha tea was the culprit for the false positive result. Komboucha is a fermented tea thought to detoxify the body and mind and though it contains less than 0.05 percent alcohol, some think it can sway the results of alcohol tests and make you look like a lush to your friends, family and potential employers.

We all know poppy seed bagels can effect drugs tests, but in addition to Komboucha, here are some new, perhaps surprising things that could possibly have you coming up dirty on drug or alcohol tests.

  1. Nasal sprays. No matter how congested you are, you’ll just have to let your head explode if you have a drug test coming up. The common cold remedy can show up as amphetamines on a screening.
  2. Ibuprofen. If you don’t want to be known as a pothead (at least to your new boss and the lab tech at the clinic), suggests avoiding Ibuprofen which can produce a false-positive result for THC.
  3. Midol. It can also show up as marijuana on a drug test. So hypothetically asking, could you smoke a little weed to cure the cramps and then blame it on the Midol? Maybe not.
  4. Purim cookies. We’ve never tried this particular delectable and it looks like we may not in the near future. These can appear like opiates on a drug test. And you may or may not want people to suspiciously start staring at your pupils or waiting for you to start fighting dancing elephants.
  5. Hemp products. Now this seems more logical. Hemp shampoos work their sneaky little (trace) THC remnants right into your scalp, which in rare cases has shown up on drug tests. Opt for patchouli oil if you desire that “I should have been born in the ’60s” scent.
  6. Tonic Water. It doesn’t make you sniffle all day or stay up all night, but tonic water is suspected to show up as cocaine on drug screenings. Also, don’t snort tonic water up your nose. That would hurt. Just a guess.
  7. Mini-Thins. The diet pills of our mom’s generation, Mini-Thins have been keeping women waif-thin and high-strung for decades. You may as well just pop a few Ecstasy pills, because that’s how they can show up on a drug test. Although we recommend staying far away from both these substancess.

So, do you believe the Lindsay Defense? Could Komboucha’s 0.05 percent alcohol content really be the culprit for her less than perfect test or do you call BS?


Want to contact the writer of this post? {encode=”[email protected]” title=”Email her”}!