• Style

My Naughty Bits Won’t Stop Sweating

Usually I find The New York Times Style section to be embarrassingly behind the times. Recent articles include trend pieces on people playing Big Buck Hunter at bars and the popularity of Twitter hashtags. “What’s next? An article about this new TV show called ‘Jersey Shore’?” I am prone to joking.

However, for the first time in a while, this week’s Style section features an article that is relevant to my immediate interests. Sort of. “Powder Surge: It’s A Guy Thing” is about men using talc, baby powder, and fancier branded powders to keep their nether-regions dry during the hot summer months. Basically, the NY Times printed an article about ball sweat and how men deal with it.So, considering I don’t have balls, why is this relevant to my interests? I, too, suffer from excessive sweating in private places, especially during summer. Specifically my ass and my breasts. My ass cheeks sweat to the point where beads of moisture can run down my legs on a particularly hot day. I have been known to form delicate puddles of breast sweat in my bras.

It is disgusting. It is the ONLY thing I dislike about summer. And lately I have been thinking a lot about how to thwart its aggressive moisture. Powder is about to become my thing too, fellas.

Come on, ladies, help me out — do you suffer from ass, boob, and vagina sweat? How do you attend to this uncomfortable problem?

[NY Times]

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