An Imagined Conversation With This Furry Model
Me: Excuse me, I was–
Model: Ssshh! Don’t wake him!
Me: OK, I can whisper. Wait … who are you talking about?
Model: The spider monkey wrapped around my waist. Me: Oh, right.
Model: He has insomnia, the poor dear. The only way he can fall asleep is if he wraps around my waist and I stand completely still for 35 minutes.
Me: Wow. And you don’t mind doing that?
Model: Not at all. It’s really the least I can do for Paul McCartney.
Me: Wait. So this is Paul McCartney’s monkey?
Model: No. The monkey’s name is Paul McCartney.
Me: Awww, that’s the cutest monkey name ever! Can I feed him a bite of my cheeseburger?
Model: Don’t be silly. Spider monkeys are frugivores.
Me: You might be the most intriguing person I’ve ever met.
Model: Have you ever met Paul McCartney?
Me: The monkey?
Model: No, the man.
Me: Sure haven’t.
Model: Well you should. He’s a very intriguing person.
Me: I will definitely keep that in mind.
[Fur-Trimmed Blazer, $627, Shopbop]