We Mourn The Loss Of The Penis Spine

Men, guess what? Your peni were supposed to have a spines like the peens of the bean weevil (left) and the marmoset. From a scientific perspective, said penile spine is meant to “grip the walls of the female’s opening” for more productive fertilization. The penis spine is also thought to clean other male sperm out by abrading the female vagina after she’s been doing it with multiple males. Tsk tsk, slutasauruses. Gosh, the penis spine sounds lovely and very comfortable. Unfortunately, our DNA took an unexpected turn and the gene required to form the penis spine molecularly short circuited. In turn, our men developed bigger brains and our women a penchant for monogamy. A very sweet evolutionary tale. Maybe I’ll write an illustrated children’s book about it. [Live Science]

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