Quickies: Chris Brown Won’t Apologize For Rihanna Assault & Inside Mariah’s Baby Shower

Jessica Wakeman | March 9, 2011 - 8:00 pm
  • Chris Brown referred to his domestic violence assault on ex-girlfriend, Rihanna, as a “mishap” in an interview with Page Six Magazine. This charming fellow added, “If I walk around apologizing to everybody, I’m gonna look like a damn fool.” Always image-conscious, that one. [Radar Online]
  • Gwyneth Paltrow has signed a $900K record deal with Atlantic Records. Don’t tell anyone who waited in line line for 10 hours straight to audition for “American Idol.” [PopEater]
  • Lady Gaga put the kibosh on a deal with Target to sell an exclusive version of her album “Born This Way” based on its lame record regarding gay rights. Last year, Target was caught donating money to a group that gave funding to a staunch opponent of gay marriage. [Styleite]
  • Zach Galifianakis’ first “Saturday Night Live” hosting effort was hysterical — and so Raven! — so we’re pumped for his second turn this weekend. Check out the funny promos! [NBC]

  • Aww, check out the deets from Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon’s baby shower. Cute! [The Young, Black & Fabulous]
  • The Great Gatsby mansion is being demolished. Where will Jay and Daisy party now? [Newsday]
  • Mel Gibson accepted a plea deal regarding the domestic violence/death threats charges made by Oksana Grigorieva, his ex-girlfriend and father of his youngest daughter. I knew this jerk wasn’t going to see a lick of jail time. [The Superficial]
  • Tamra Barney from “The Real Housewives Of Orange County” claimed she was roofied with the date rape drug, Rohypnol, while out partying with other “Housewives” in NYC. Terrifying. [PopEater]
  • Toni Braxton, her sisters and their mother are going the Kardashian-family route in a new realitiy show called “Braxton Family Values.” [PopEater]
  • Anna Kendrick is addicted to Angry Birds. Obviously. It’s awesome. [Oh No They Didn’t!]
  • This collection of photos in which Steven Tyler looks like an old lesbian is so wrong, but so funny. [BuzzFeed]
  • Over 74,000 people applied to be Charlie Sheen’s social media intern. That is a sad comment on society right there. [TMZ]
  • Tila Tequila thinks she’d do such a good job at being one of Charlie Sheen’s goddesses that he wouldn’t “need” two. [The Superficial]
  • Chelsea Handler had something nasty to say about Kim Kardashian’s new single, of course. [PopEater]
  • I just love this list of 52 female comedians. Anyone seen any of them? [Huffington Post]
  • If you’re a paparazzo who gets in Miley Cyrus’ face, she will mess your s**t up. [E! Online]
  • ZOMG, there’s going to be an hour-long episode of “30 Rock”! [Oh No They Didn’t!]