We Rate Jenni “JWoww” Farley’s Rules

Earlier this month, Jenni “JWoww” Farley became the third “Jersey Shore” cast member to pen a book, releasing The Rules According to JWoww: Shore Tested Secrets on Landing a Mint Guy, Staying Fresh to Death, and Kicking the Competition. (The Situation and Snooki beat her to the bookshelves.) “Women need dating rules like they need bras,” she writes in the intro. “Sure, you can go without them, but if you do—and you’re sporting a nice boob job like I am—you are gonna be flopping out there in the wind. You need the right support.” Nice analogy? [MSNBC]

JWoww has been on the road, hardcore promoting her 214 page book. On Wednesday night, she talked to Leno about it, giving him a few examples of her 60 rules. First, she explained, do not drink on a first date. “Don’t end up like we are on the show. Avoid that,” Jenni said. Yep, I’ll cosign on that.

After the jump, we’ve collected some of the rules from Jenni’s book that she’s discussed so far and rate how sound we think her advice is.

Rule #17: Bust your guy’s chops. When Jenni mentioned this one to Leno, he pushed her for an example. “Roger’s going to kill me. He’s a bodybuilder. He’s huge. He’s about 6′ 3″. I like to be like, ‘Oh, you’re looking a little small recently,’” she said. “Got to keep it interesting.” [MTV]


Soundness (on a scale of 1 to 10): 7. We agree poking fun at someone can be a flirty-playful way to bond, but you have to stay away from subjects that the person is at all sensitive about. Also, you have to be able to take it when they make a joke at your expense—this isn’t a one way street.


Rule #4: Check the negative attitude. Jenni is a big believer in this one. “If you’re going to go to a club with an attitude, you’re just going to bring people in with an attitude,” she said. “I’ve done it myself. I go to clubs and if I’m happy, I have a good aura about myself, I attract good types of people. Where if I’m the wallflower—sitting in a corner, pissed off—you’re going to have people like that drawn to you.” [NewJersey.com]


Soundness: 9. It’s true—though we’ll add to fun for yourself, not just to meet guys. If you feel blah, just stay home. Or do something low-key with a friend who will cheer you up.


Rule #9: If you want to make the first move, do it. Jenni isn’t about sitting back and waiting for a hot guy to come to her. “I approached [Roger] and I’m still with him,” she says. “So it works for me. Some guys like that about a woman. And some guys are a little timid. They see a pretty girl, they’re sometimes timid to come up to you. Better you make the first move.” [NewJersey.com]


Soundness: 10. Amen, sister. The worst thing someone can do is not be interested. And hey, you can take that.


The Rule: Show him what to do in bed. In the book, Jenni writes, “Don’t bark orders, instead purr like a kitten when he’s in the right area and guide his hand to your hot spots.” [Hollywood Life]


Soundness: 9. Everyone out there, male or female, wants to please their partner and will appreciate guidance given in a positive way.


The Rule: Don’t let a guy compare you to another woman. Here’s how Jenni says to handle it if this happens. “1. Punch him in the mouth; 2. Tell him to stick a sock in it,” she writes. [Hollywood Life]


Soundness: -1. No punching! Ever! But if a guy does do this, you should let him know verbally it’s not okay and bothers you.


The Rule: If you’re wanting someone to change, move on. Jenni references her breakup with Tommy on this one. “You always hope that that person can get better and one day they’ll wake up and they’ll be the perfect man you always wanted,” she said during a recent interview. “And it’s never the case. I was in that relationship for a year. And the best thing I ever did was move on and out.” In another interview she elaborated, “My biggest thing is never settle. The moment you settle, you kind of set yourself up for disaster. I feel if you’re like, ‘Well, I don’t like that but I’ll deal with it,’ in the long run it’s going to eat away at you.” [NewJersey.com, MSNBC]


Soundness: 10. Amen again, sister.



What do you think of JWoww’s rules?

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