What’s Your Inner Age?

I have this theory that everyone has an inner age that best captures their essence. You are born your inner age and remain it throughout your life, regardless of your outer age. I’ve identified the inner age of everyone important in my life. My mom is 16, my dad is 21, my brother is 35, and me? I am eternally eight years old. If you spend the day with me, you’ll agree. I am a clumsy goof-ball. I like to flap around the room and pretend I’m a bird. I still laugh at poop jokes. I live for birthday cake. I’m eight. I was once in a relationship with a guy whose inner age was 80. He moved slowly, liked quiet time, and ate wheat bran every morning. Our inner age gap caused problems for us from time to time, like when I woke him up in the morning by steamrolling him. As you might imagine, grandpa didn’t like that so much. So how do you determine your inner age? Find out how, after the jump.Use your instincts. What age do you feel like? What decade of your life can you picture existing in forever? What words do people use to describe you? Do they match any particular age range? Ask yourself these question, but don’t think about it too hard, just let it come to you. This is just for fun after all. If you think your inner age is 45, nobody is going to be able to prove you wrong. So relax.

Hobbies and interests. I know that Amelia’s inner age, for example, is 13 because of what she gets excited about — Sweet Valley High, cute boys, gossip mags, and reality TV. So what do you get excited about? Think about your interests and the age they correlate with.

Life peaks. When did you peak or when do you think you’ll peak in life? For me it was most definitely when I was eight. Best year of my damn life. Not that there weren’t many other great years and hopefully more to come, but I was just so in my element at eight. If you have already lived through your inner age year, you won’t forget it. If you haven’t, it will be an age you’re looking forward to.

So what do you think your inner age is? Share in the comments.