Quickies: Sarah Palin Is “Great Masturbation Material” For Tracy Morgan

  • Tracy Morgan called Sarah Palin “great masturbation material” — a sexist assessment of the telegenic but dimwitted ex-governor, but nevertheless one that holds a grain of truth. So, if his “30 Rock” co-star Tina Fey does a spot-on Sarah Palin impersonation, does that mean Tracy thinks Tina is great masturbation material, too? [The Superficial]
  • Author Terry McMillian recently tweeted that Willow and Jaden Smith were being “pimped” and “exploited” by their parents, Will Smith and Jada Pinkett-Smith, and that she saw an “arrogance in their demeanor and behavior.” She then issued an apology, no doubt in response to rabid “Whip My Hair” fans. [ONTD]
  • Bristol Palin pulled out of a “Sexual Responsibility Week” talk at Washington University in St. Louis, Missouri, after students threatened a revolt. [TMZ.com]

  • Taylor Swift has “perfect hair,” according to a not-very-official sounding “study” conducted by two plastic surgeons about who their patients admire most. [Celebuzz]
  • The Jonas Brothers are going to honor President Ronald Reagan with a tribute concert on what would have been his 100th birthday. I’m sure they have a deep, deep appreciation for deregulation and trickle-down economics. [Celebuzz]
  • Experts say Charlie Sheen’s rampant drug use, arrests and hospitalizations could be harming his children. NO S**T, SHERLOCK. [Fox 411]
  • Lisa Rinna’s name is being floated to replace Regis Philbin on “Live With Regis And Kelly” when he retires soon. Wait, won’t that upset the delicate TV co-host balance of “old dude” and “hot piece of ass young enough to be his daughter”? [TMZ.com]
  • Could Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg guest star on “Saturday Night Live”? Jesse Eisenberg, who played him in the movie “The Social Network,” is hosing this week, so anything is possible. [PopEater]
  • Weirdo director Gregg Araki recommends five movies with awesome sex scenes. [NYMag.com]