Dear Wendy Updates: “Righteous” Responds

It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing today. After the jump, we hear from “Righteous” who wondered if it would be appropriate or simply “stirring up old history” if she were to apologize to an ex with whom she caused an ugly breakup. After the jump, find out whether she apologized to the guy and how she’s doing today. Plus, I’ve got some exciting news of my own I want to share, so keep reading.

Thanks for your advice. It was realistic and the rational route to take. I, however, just CAN’T listen to better judgment sometimes. I did write — and send — my apologies. I got a response shortly after that was equally as honest and apologetic, as he had some confessions to things he’d done that I was never even aware of. We eventually spoke on the phone, which wasn’t nearly as awkward as it could have been. I can finally say I have closure to that chapter of my life. I’m relieved that I listened to my heart, and feel slightly more mature as a result of overcoming a such stress factor while surprisingly mending a friendship. Basically what I’ve learned is: when the outcome can’t be worse then the existing situation, TAKE THE RISK.

Phew, I’m glad that apologizing to him turned out to be a healing thing for you both. And your last line sure sounds nice, but the fact is we often don’t know whether an outcome is going to be better or worse than the existing situation. That’s why it’s called a risk. In this case, I’m very happy your risk was worth it.

Now, as for my own “risk,” I’m excited to announce that I am launching a site of my own today called It’s been an enormous pleasure to be part of The Frisky community, and I’ll still post new columns here once or twice a week, but my official home will now be In addition to daily columns, I’ve got some new features I’ll be rolling out in the coming weeks, so I hope you’ll stop by and stick around as you continue to engage in the wonderful community we’ve built here at The Frisky, too! As always, you can follow me on Twitter and on Facebook. And if you have relationship-oriented questions, you can email me at either {encode=”[email protected]” title=”[email protected]”} or {encode=”[email protected]” title=”[email protected]”}. Thanks so much for your continued support as I begin this new venture!