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Ladies, Stop Crying! Your Tears Turn Him Off!

Well, crap. Turning dudes on — I’ve been doing it wrong. Apparently, bawling my eyes out in front of a man isn’t the way to get his d**k hard. This revelatory information is brought to you by a new study which shows a female tears emit signals that actually turn men off. Male participants who sniffed “odorless tears” (do tears usually smell?) from women who cried during a sad movie had lower testosterone levels and were less sexually aroused by or attracted to the opposite sex than male participants who sniffed salt water. The explanation? For starters, when people cry in the presence of another person, they’re seeking comfort, a biological fact that is unique to humans; no other animals cry when they’re in distress. Additionally, the tears shed because of heightened emotion are chemically different than those that spill over when you’re, say, chopping onions. So, basically, “if women are communicating a chemical message that they need comfort, not sex, it seems appropriate that a man’s testosterone level would take a dive.” Possibly more interesting than the ZOMG revelation that men don’t sprout boners when women are sobbing is that researchers also think there could be a connection between emotional tears and lowering aggression. So, like, turning on the waterworks when your man is being an a-hole could make him chill out? Oh wait — tried, tested, knew that already. [ABC News]

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