I don’t hide the fact that the holidays are not my favorite time of year. Christmas does not make me think of tinsel-covered trees and red and green wrapping paper. It makes me think of crowded stores, overpriced gifts and too much family time. Plus, it falls right around the coldest and darkest days of the year. If Jesus was so special, why didn’t he pick a better month for his birthday?
New Year’s is slightly better because it involves lots of alcohol and, the next day, you get to start afresh. The thing is, I was never very good at the resolution part. I always say I’m going to lose weight, think positive thoughts and stop fighting with my family. It never happens.
This year, I had a better idea that will kill two holidays with one fellow swoop. Instead of asking for more stuff or making promises to myself I can’t keep, I’m going to make a wish list of all the things I’d like to see happen in the gay community in the coming year. Some are personal and some are about the big picture—but they’re all things I want. No, you can’t buy them at Macy’s. But maybe if we all work together, in 2011 we can make some changes. Here’s to hoping.
- Gay marriage gets legalized. Now that “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” has been repealed, I’m hoping we can come to some sort of agreement on this gay marriage issue. If we’re equal when it comes to going to bat for America and battling it out in some foreign country, we should be able to say “I do.” Marriage is not a religious institution (my parents are atheists), nor is it sacred (one in two people get divorced), so let’s let the rest of us have a go at the altar, sound good?
- Kristen Stewart comes out. I’m not big on outing people and I think it’s awful the way media speculate so much on celebs’ sexuality. But I must admit, I’m a total sucker for Kristen in “The Runaways.” If she were a lesbian, it would just make my fantasies so much better.
- Men learn to stop sexualizing lesbianism. What am I saying!? That’s never going to happen.
- Another good lesbian TV show comes out. Not just one with a few gay characters sprinkled in for effect. Not some “reality” show about uber beautiful power lesbians. I’m thinking more along the lines of “The L Word,” but on a mainstream network so I don’t have to spend a ton of money each month to watch it. Oh yeah, and if Kate Moennig is in it, all the better. Swoon.
- My girlfriend comes out to her extended family. It’s a long shot and probably not the best idea for my girlfriend to tell her religious, homophobic family that she’s gay. But until she does, only her parents will know about me. There’s something wacky about dating someone for 14 months and never meeting a single aunt, uncle or cousin.
- Lesbians stop hating on each other. Although I’m no longer on the dating scene, I shudder for those who are. I hope that, in the coming year, gay chicks stop hating on bi gals, questioning girls about their sexual history on a first date and judging those of us who happened to come out late or were with men for a time. Get over it, ladies—sexuality can be fluid!
- I learn to better cope with my anger when confronted by homophobia. Yes, it’s hurtful, offensive and just plain mean, but homophobia is not about the person it’s directed towards. It’s about the individual doing the hating. The more I see this, the more I can make peace with nasty remarks and stupid stereotypes. Sometimes, a smile is the best defense.
- My relationship stays just the way it is. Yes, it’s that good.
Everyone, have a great 2011! And please tell me what’s on your wish list for Christmas and New Year’s.