Ho, Ho, Ho: Unwrap This Package From Santa

I kind of want a boyfriend for a lot of reasons — like regular sex, foot rubs, companionship, someone to vacation with, etc. But I really, really want a boyfriend because then I could buy him these boxers and make him wear them year-round. Am I alone in thinking they’re funny yet totally sexy? Oh, Santa baby, indeed. [$18, Toddland]

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