Dear Wendy Updates: “Lost In Translation” Responds

It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing today. After the jump, we hear from “Lost In Translation,” a 26-year-old woman whose language exchange IM buddy from France was planning to make a special trip to Calgary to see her while he was in Toronto for a wedding. “I know he’s not rich, and he doesn’t seem to be coming to Calgary for any other reason. I’m hard-pressed to believe that someone would go that far out of his way just for a short platonic meeting. What is he really expecting of me? Should I ask my boyfriend to join us?” She wrote. After the jump, find out if she went through with seeing him.

Thanks so much for your reply, and thanks to the readers for their comments. After I read your opening lines, I couldn’t believe that I had ever considered going through with his visit. So I dropped everything and told him that I could not go through with our tentative plans to meet. I said that I had not been aware of the circumstances (his recent separation, his lack of other compelling reasons to fly to Calgary) when I had agreed to coffee, and now that I knew, it made me uncomfortable. He was very gracious in reply (no mention of whether or not a plane ticket had already been booked!), apologizing for the awkward situation and agreeing that it would be a mistake for him to visit. I daresay I think he was actually relieved. I have to admit that I didn’t take your advice completely, though, Wendy; we are still swapping languages, but much, much less frequently.

I realize this update comes late, but I wanted to wait until his proposed visit date had passed in case there was anything new to add. Luckily it came and went without event. Thanks again Wendy, for giving me the wake-up call I needed to prevent a potentially disastrous outcome.

Thanks for the update. I’m glad you avoided a potentially very awkward situation!

If you’re someone I’ve given advice to in the past, I’d love to hear from you, too. Email me at {encode=”[email protected]” title=”[email protected]”} with a link to the original post, and let me know whether you followed the advice and how you’re doing now.

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