Dear Wendy Updates: “Twenty-Something Virgin” Responds

It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing today. After the jump, we hear from “Twenty-Something Virgin,” the young woman who worried she blew her one chance to get laid when she turned down a friend’s suggestion that they have sex. I suggested she at least give a relationship with the guy a shot — if that was possibly of interest to them both — and see where things went from there. So, is she seeing the guy? Is she still a virgin? Find out all after the jump.

Thank you for posting my letter. Although I liked my friend back, I don’t think that a date or an actual relationship would even be possible. We’re not only living in different towns, we’re also in very different stages in our lives, as he is still in school and I’m working on my career. I’d rather wait for someone who I could see more often if I was to begin a relationship.

To those who believe I should separate sex and love, while I understand your point, I don’t think I’d be able to. In the past, when I told a guy I liked him, and he would tell me he liked me, it would be marred by the fact that he either had a girlfriend (of which I was unaware), liked my friend better, or was screwing around with two other girls on the side. Maybe there’s a trust issue there, but after many of these events, I’d like to make sure that someone really does want me and isn’t screwing around with me.

I want to thank those who reassured me that it was worth waiting. Right now, as I’m entering a new stage with my life, I’ve decided not to focus on my virginity and singledom so much. Right now, I want to focus on improving and becoming more comfortable with myself. I think once I really know who I am, it’ll be easier to find someone who will see how wonderful I am. I think I’m worth at least that much.

Thank you again!

Thanks for the update, and best of luck to you.

If you’re someone I’ve given advice to in the past, I’d love to hear from you, too. Email me at {encode=”[email protected]” title=”[email protected]”} with a link to the original post, and let me know whether you followed the advice and how you’re doing now.

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