A Handy Pocket Guide To Vaginal Euphemisms, Such As “Beef Curtains”

If you asked to touch my slobbering bulldog or my lobster claw, I wouldn’t have a damn clue what you were saying. But that’s because I don’t have this handy-dandy pocket guide to vaginal euphemisms! The number of ways to refer to a vagina as “just a place to put a penis” might alarm me if I actually believed anyone other than Penthouse letter writers refer to my beautiful ladyflower as “beef curtains.” [Feministing]