Madonna’s Newest Project: Hard Candy Fitness Centers

Madonna’s arm muscles are still a thing of wonder. So her newest venture sort of almost makes sense. Madonna is opening up a chain of gyms called Hard Candy Fitness Centers, named for her last album, natch. The first gym is opening in Mexico City and branches will also be heading to Russia, Brazil, Argentina, as well as multiple locations in Europe and Asia. What, no US of A? The idea behind the gyms is to “create an environment inspired by Madonna’s vision.” In other words, music, lighting, and ambiance will be a big deal. The gyms will specialize in classes like Zumba, Latin Moves, Capoeria, and Cardio Kickboxing. Naturally, there will be a lot of yoga. There’s even a “Mind Body Studio.”

My only complaint: a gym name with the word “candy” in it.