What’s Up With CGI-Enhanced Nudity?

The perverts of America are freaking out because Jessica Alba’s recent nude scene in “Machete” was apparently CGI-created. Instead of getting naked for the role, which Alba has steadfastly resolved to avoid at all costs, she wore white underwear which were then digitally removed in post-production. Judging from the before and after pictures, they took a couple pounds of flesh off as well. But people aren’t freaking out because of the chop-shop job on her tummy; it seems that people feel duped for believing they had actually seen Alba naked. Personally, I don’t understand why they care so much since so much of what we see in movies are body doubles anyway. And as Entertainment Weekly pointed out, there are only four options if an actress doesn’t want to be nude—cut the scene, wear a bra all the time like Carrie Bradshaw, use CGI, get a body double to fake it, or hire a new actress. And of the options, I think I might be on Team CGI, especially if the nudity is actually necessary for the role, which it totally wasn’t for “Machete.” If you’re looking for gratuitous nudity, why not go faux? [EW]

We’ve scrounged up some other CGI nude moments in movie history to continue the debate.

  • Angelina Jolie was actually a little uncomfortable with her CGI nudity in “Beowulf,” which is totally fair since she looks like she’s nipple-less and painted gold. In an interview, Jolie said, “I was really surprised that I felt that exposed. There are certain moments where I felt actually shy — and called home, just to explain that the fun movie that I had done that was digital animation was, in fact, a little different than we expected. I didn’t expect it to feel as real, and so because of especially the type of character I play, it was kind of funny at first.” [TV Shark]
  • For the movie “Hippie Hippie Shake,” Sienna Miller stripped down for one of those nakey dance parties that hippies were so into. But her personal grooming habits didn’t befit a woman of the ’60s and since a merkin (pube toupee) didn’t do the trick, her pubes were digitally enhanced. An insider said, “She’s very much a girl of the naughties—and this extends to her personal upkeep. Unfortunately, Brazilians weren’t common in the ’60s and Sienna’s part involved one or two nude scenes—meaning that her grooming habits were on full display.” If anything is going to be CGI-ed, I’m kind of glad it’s to turn someone into a bush lady. [Ninja Dude]
  • I was really excited to see “Watchmen” in theaters, but one of the most distracting (not that I’m complaining) parts was Billy Crudup’s big blue penis for his role as Dr. Manhattan. His larger-than-life character was radiating blue and entirely naked almost all the time. I’m sure the theater full of boys were less than excited to realize there was going to be a massive member starring back at them. When asked if he had in fact gone commando for the role, Crudup said, “I did all my shots in the nude so if you see anything, it was totally me. It was totally me.” Not to say that I don’t believe him, but I guess it would explain why women fight over the guy. [MTV]
  • I guess that once a movie goes into post production and has to start fixing things, it makes sense to be thorough. For the movie “After.Life,” Christina Ricci’s tattoos had to be edited out and according to someone who pays way more attention to nudity than I am capable of, there is a point where CGI was used to show someone else’s breasts on Ricci’s chest. According to the Celebrity Nudity Database, they did a choppy job of it and didn’t even get her nipples the right shade! Oh, the humanity! [CNDB]
  • I guess the fun part of CGI is that you can create worlds that can’t exist, or in Kevin Bacon’s case during filming of “Hollow Man,” they can enhance them. Bacon spent a good amount of the movie naked and invisible, but then they took every opportunity to show his manhood in various stages of visibilty (covered in water, shaking off water, in a smoke cloud, skinless, in infrared cameras). And when it was visible, there was apparently some enhancement of size and shake-ability. There’s also the CGI science behind an invisible man feeling up a very visible woman, which must have been a fun project for the CGI animator. [Cracked]