• Relationships

I Moved And Now I Don’t Have Any Friends — Help!

Oh, no! It’s Female Friendship Week, and I don’t have any friends! OK, that’s not entirely true. I do have girlfriends. They just live in other states. Recently, I moved, and now I don’t have anyone to pal around with. Finding new girlfriends? I guess I’ll have to work on that. About two months ago, I relocated, and now I’m in a new city where I only know a few people. At first, I was really focused on getting situated in this new place. I shopped for what I needed, figured out where to do my grocery shopping and my laundry, and occasionally chatted up other women at, say, the hair salon and the bookstore. But that’s not the same as having a good girlfriend where you live, and I guess I’m not entirely sure how to go about shopping for one of those.

My best friend lived about a mile from me where I used to live. We met 17 years ago, so she knows me like the back of her hand. (And sometimes uses that against me!) She’s married and has two kids, so she doesn’t have a lot of free time, but we had a weekly ritual of getting together to watch a movie, eat Chinese food, and catch up on each other’s lives. Now? Not so much.

In the last month or so, I have met a few women I could see developing friendships with. The wife of a friend of a friend. The woman who did my hair. This chatty chick I met at a boutique. But it feels a little weird, the prospect of taking the next step. Do I call them up seemingly out of the blue and ask them out for a, um, date? Awkward! Or should I find something I want to do and ask them if they want to do it, too?

In a way, making new girlfriends is like dating, I guess, in that you’re not sure whether or not they like you, and, oh, my God, what if they don’t? Of course, the alternative is staying at home and watching movies on Netflix, which gets old and isn’t so much fun. If you’ve got ideas for me or other women about making friends or want to share the story of how you met your best friend, put them in the comments.

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