Who Should Courteney Cox Date Next?

So, since his interview with Howard Stern yesterday, David Arquette has quickly been turning himself into a bad guy. In the interview, David said that his and Courteney Cox’s marriage failed because she was sick of being his mom. He also revealed that it had been four months since they’d had sex. And then he hit even rock bottom, revealing that he’d had sex with “the girl in the paper,” aka Lindsay Lohan puncher Jasmine Waltz, “once, maybe twice.”

Just for that, we are setting Courteney up! Here’s who we think she should date next …

  1. Matthew Perry. Courteney should have art imitate life and date the dude who played Chandler on “Friends”!
  2. Ben Harper. He happens to be getting divorced himself AND he’s David’s business partner in their hippie fashion line. Revenge!
  3. Jennifer Aniston. Jen has been waiting for this moment for a while. They would easily replace Ellen and Portia as the ultimate lesbian power couple of Hollywood.
  4. Brian Van Holt. Courteney allegedly already has her eye on her “Cougar Town” co-star. If that’s the case, we say go for it.
  5. John Mayer. It would cause a war with JenAn. But there would never be a tabloid cover without their faces on it again. Gerard Butler would also work for this endgame.
  6. George Clooney. Elisabetta, Schlisabetta.
  7. Skeet Ulrich. Things lasted 11 years with one of her “Scream” co-stars. Maybe she could go the distance with another?
  8. Jim Carrey. Did you know that these two dated in 1995? Me, neither. But how convenient—that they could get back together now that they’re both single.