Tabloid Cheat Sheet: Why Is Everyone Breaking Up? What Dirt Does The Nanny Have On Angelina?

While celebrity couples like Courteney Cox and David Arquette are still reeling from their separations, tabloids are busy conjecturing on what cosmic forces separated the pair. The juicy possibilities they have come up with so far: affairs, lack of sex, and just overall boredom. The surprising split has also given gossip mags another reason to analyze the security of their favorite celeb relationships. Watch out, TomKat! We sorted through all the unnamed sources to give you the dirtiest details about what could be happening in Hollywood. Enjoy!

  • Us Weekly is offering a crash course on Jennifer Grey, the “Dirty Dancing” star who has waltzed her way onto “Dancing with the Stars.” Turns out it was Grey who put herself in a corner, quitting acting after being in a car crash in 1987 with then-fiance Matthew Broderick. The accident left her with a damaged spinal cord that caused pain for decades, until a recent pre-“DTWS” doctor’s appointment. The meeting lead to the discovery and treatment of early thyroid cancer and several spinal surgeries. Now, Grey is pain-free and addicted to the dance floor, but says it was her husband, actor Clark Gregg, and daughter that got her through it all. Another Jennifer tidbit: she was also briefly engaged to Johnny Depp. Say what?!
  • By the sounds of it, Christina Aguilera and her music-executive hubby Jordan Bratman are no longer getting dirrty. An insider told Us that the couple lost their spark and have been living apart for months. The source shares that the couple has moved from lovers and friends to just buddies, and that even a romantic trip to Italy couldn’t put things back into place. The pair are said to be on good terms and keeping it together for 2-year-old son Max. At least this doesn’t sound like another drawn-out Hollywood mega-divorce.
  • With all these celebrity couples heading to the over-populated town of splitsville, let’s focus on a famous pair coming together instead, shall we? Actor Dave Annable and actress Odette Yustman got hitched this week in a laid-back affair that featured a family-style meal instead of an extravagant dinner service. The couple shared their tear-filled nuptials with their 200+ guests in Ojai, California. Aside from scenic surroundings and a causal atmosphere, the wedding also featured big-name guests like Harrison Ford and Calista Flockhart. There, now don’t we feel better? [Us Weekly]

  • OK, back to the land of surprising breakups. People has all the details on what derailed Courteney and David. The famously mismatched couple’s opposites stopped attracting. As Arquette shared with Howard Stern, he slept with waitress Jasmine Waltz “once … maybe twice.” But friends say this infidelity shouldn’t paint Arquette as the bad guy, because the pair had a relationship that thrived on them doing their own thing. Last time I checked, “doing your own thing” did not mean “doing” another person, but I’m not from Hollywood.
  • Remember when James Franco started doing all that goofy stuff like being on soap operas and going to three different universities at once? Well, something finally came of it, aside from the insane enjoyment of seeing Franco on “General Hospital.” It’s James’ book debut! His first big venture into the literary world is a collection of stories about the “unrelenting” feeling of being a teenager called Palo Alto. Franco shares that the tales are semi-autobiographical, but that not all the sex and violence experienced by the protagonists was taken from direct experience. One thing is for sure, Palo Alto is definitely a little naughty. “I told my mother she is not allowed to [read the book],” says Franco. But he hopes everyone else will.
  • Mark Zuckerberg’s family must have seen “The Social Network” because they seem pissed about how Mark is portrayed. Friends and family have gone to People to lobby against the unemotional representation Zuckerberg is getting on the silver screen. His sister Randi says that her younger brother was always thinking ahead and trying to help his family solve problems. While friends of the tycoon claim that the movie is missing Mark’s “fun side” and “his heart,” the sources admit that Zuckerberg might have been a tad socially awkward, but that doesn’t mean he is an evil, privacy-stealing mastermind. Though popular opinion would beg to differ. [People]

  • Russell Brand is here with his rite of passage story that landed him in the arms of fiancee Katy Perry. But instead of the usual PG tale of battling cultural hardships and finding yourself, Russell’s personal journey included thousands of one-night stands and a battle with alcoholism. Brand is certain those demons are behind him now that he is engaged to Perry, who “emits some gentle power that makes [him] want to be good.” The comedian shares that for him and Perry, it was love at second sight, when the singer was able to keep up with his banter. Even though Perry may be lady 1001 for Russell, he assures us that she is not a jealous woman.
  • Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt’s ex-nanny is telling all, and none of the Jolie-Pitt family is safe. The anonymous ex-babysitter shares with In Touch that the house is total chaos, with all the children running wild and making a mess of everything. The source says most of the blame can be put on Angelina, who is very liberal with her child-rearing and more concerned with work, unlike her tabloid supermom persona would suggest. Allegedly, the kids are allowed to curse, watch rated-R movies, eat all the junk food they want, and often get in physical fights with one another. Brad and Angelina are apparently at a loss about how to discipline their children, and as a result the kids rule the household. Just another reason it would be awesome to be a part of the Jolie-Pitt brood.
  • I know last week I probably told you that Kim Kardashian was dating some new man, but forget that! Because now Kim is dating a new NEW man and he is an ex-Power Ranger. Kardashian is now being linked to former blue Ranger Michael Copon, who has also appeared on “One Tree Hill.” A source shares that the two have been in similar social circles for years, but are finally starting to spark romantically. I really don’t think you can top a Power Ranger in the dating world, except perhaps for a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle. Or Captain Planet. [In Touch]

  • Rachel Zoe is eating for two, which means she is finally eating for one. Star says it can confirm that Zoe is pregnant thanks to an unnamed source who says she is waiting until the pregnancy is farther along before announcing it. Rachel is said to be doing all the right soon-to-be-mommy things, like takings pre-natal vitamins and getting plenty of sleep, but doctors are still worried that her weight and age could negatively affect the pregnancy. But that apparently didn’t stop Rachel and husband Rodger Berman from getting excited. “She’s already sketching little dresses,” shares the source. Are you sure those aren’t for her?
  • You know who I feel sorry for when I read a Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise tabloid story? Suri. Star’s cover story about the couple claims that TomKat is on the brink once again, because Tom is urging Katie to have another baby as she agreed to in their $10 million marriage contract. Meanwhile, Katie is holding out because Tom never gave her the movie role he promised her after the birth of Suri. All this alleged contract neglect is causing tension in the couple’s relationship, causing them to lash out at each other whenever they are together. Holmes is said to be seeking legal help from her father to see if she can get out of her marriage contract before the 2012 renewal date. So where does this leave poor Suri — as a contractual clause that gets a really nice wardrobe?
  • Apparently, we are done questioning whether Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart are dating, since they have now thrown caution to the wind, or so Star claims. The article suggests that the two have gotten pretty serious and are becoming less intense about keeping their relationship under wraps. So much so that they are telling friends that they plan to live together full-time during the filming of “Breaking Dawn” as a trial marriage of sorts. The only issue in the way of their faux-marital bliss is new “Twilight” co-star MyAnna Buring, who shares several romantic scenes with Rob. Sources say this could cause some jealously with Kristen constantly on set, but that Pattinson is prepared to deal with it. I’m prepared to just know if they are legitimately dating or not. [Star]