Dear Wendy Updates: “No Longer Booty Called” Responds

It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing today. After the jump, we hear from “No Longer Booty Called,” whose booty call of nine months suddenly stopped contacting her. “I’m not upset that it ended, but I feel as if I have a right to know why things just came to a halt,” she wrote. We all told her what happened: that he found someone else and moved on. But did she ever find out the details from the guy himself?

Well, I got in touch with him and he never really admitted to moving on, but it’s quite obvious. Like every guy, he had excuse after excuse after excuse, which only transpired into juvenile bickering. It’s unfortunate to lose a good friend in this situation (which we could have been had we not started to engage in the horizontal hustle), but I’ve taken the high road on this one and I’m hoping he’ll do the same. I don’t regret what we did and I know deep down, neither does he. Appreciate you, Wendy, and all the Frisky readers who helped me gather the courage to say something and stop getting trampled on by someone whom I don’t need in my life. :) You are all awesome.

Well, I’m glad you’ve got some sense of closure and are moving on. I do take some issue in your comment, “Like every guy, he had excuse after excuse after excuse … ” though. Not every guy is a tool or a douchebag or whatever. Seriously, the worst thing you can do is let a bad experience with one guy — or even multiple guys — color your view of an entire gender. I don’t mean to pick on you specifically; this is something I’ve noticed from many, many women, but your letter has given me an opportunity to address it.

There are so many really wonderful guys out there who are respectful and kind and generous and mature. If you found one bad apple in the bunch, learn from that and move on. If you keep ending up with bad apples, you need to investigate your pattern and look inside to determine why you keep making bad choices. Blaming an entire gender for your bad luck in love is just lazy. End of rant.

If you’re someone I’ve given advice to in the past, I’d love to hear from you, too. Email me at {encode=”dearwendy@thefrisky.com” title=”dearwendy@thefrisky.com”} with a link to the original post, and let me know whether you followed the advice and how you’re doing now.

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