First Date Confessions We Wish We’d Never Heard

We ladies take on an awful lot of the responsibility when a date goes bad. But sometimes it’s just not our fault. Sometimes the guys we date just don’t know when to shut up, and end up saying rude, stupid or downright utterly shocking things to us. After the jump, some of THE WORST first date confessions we’ve heard from guys. Stuff they should have waited to say or, perhaps, never said at all. It’s not that we don’t appreciate their candidness — but perhaps they should have waited until we got to know each other a little better before confessing their deepest secrets.

And don’t forget to tell us about the worst, most appalling, or surprising thing a guy’s ever confessed to you.

  • That he was a heroin addict and had spent three months on Rikers Island detoxing.
  • That he was a MURDERER. As in, he had killed someone with a broken wine bottle when he was 16.
  • That his last girlfriend was 16. He was 32.
  • That he was under federal investigation for insider trading.
  • That he was polyamorous. (He told me this in the first 30 seconds of date).
  • That he was unable to achieve orgasm and he and his last girlfriend saw a sex therapist.
  • That he had been stalking me online for over a year.
  • That he was a communist and writing a manifesto on drugs.
  • That he was married (!) but probably getting a divorce, didn’t have a job (although pretended he did because he was an “artist” — meaning he made just about the scariest theater masks you have ever seen in your life), and lived with his parents.
  • That he was a sex addict in an open relationship.
  • That he was a 9/11 conspiracy theorist who thought Bush/Cheney/Rove were behind the terrorist attacks.