“The Real Housewives of New Jersey” reunion part two … what to say, what to say. I thought we were going to end with more subtext and angry body language and call it a day. And then these hugs happened. I’m going to go ahead and crown it one of the most awkward moments on television ever.I was still reeling from Danielle’s wig in a duffel bag and her courtroom-like demo of how Ashley pulled out one of her beaded extensions. WTF? She came with a wig? How long did she spend planning that little scene? But it was fun watching Andy Cohen try to pull out one of the wig’s extensions. He could barely do it. Then Kim G. made a surprise appearance so that everyone could tell her how much they hate her, except Jacqueline, who likes everyone.
And then Jacqueline decided to apologize to Danielle, which made her cry. That inspired Teresa to make a half-ass apology. Then Danielle got off the couch and gave Teresa the most awks hug ever. Like out of nowhere! Teresa nearly fainted. And then Danielle wrapped her body around Jacqueline for like 20 minutes and whispered sweet nothings in her ear about how she loves her and wants to make a skin suit out of her. (OK, she didn’t say that, but it was implied.) Jacqueline looked like she had accidentally stepped into a lion’s cage at the zoo and didn’t want to make any sudden moves. But Danielle just kept holding on for dear life. Caroline’s eyes were rolling so fast I thought she was having a seizure and Andy Cohen was coming in his pants just thinking of the inevitable ratings. I was so uncomfortable that I hid behind the couch screaming, “Make it stop!”
Season two is over for now, but that hug will live on as perhaps the scariest Danielle moment yet. It was her farewell to the show. Love and light, “RHNJ.” We’ll see you next season, sans Staub. What a fitting last name.