The Situation’s Financial Situation

Jersey Shore” has become a cultural phenomenon, but I don’t think that we really thought through the consequences. Like the fact that Mike The Situation Sorrentino might be raking in about $5 million this year. What does this mean for the world? Obviously, Ed Hardy will be seeing a good hunk of that cash. And just this week, he dropped $100K for a Bentley with custom rims and a new sound system, and he got his brother one, too! So where is this $5 million coming from? It’s been reported that Sorrentino is earning about $60,000 an episode for “Jersey Shore.” He also got a six-figure advance for his autobiography. For all his party appearances and product lines, he makes $15,000 to $50,000 a pop—he has a fitness video and vodka line in the works. Not to mention endorsement deals with Vitamin Water and Reebok. Guh. And he’s going to make a good amount of money on “Dancing With the Stars” as well.

His manager, Mike Petolino at Gotham Entertainment said, “We are really excited about all the opportunities coming Mike’s way … Our goal has always been to try to build a brand if the situation presented itself.” If the situation presented itself? I believe he has!

I understand America’s reality television obsession. But won’t these riches also change our favorite guidos and guidettes? Part of the beauty of “Jersey Shore” was the simplicity of their lives—it was all GTL and fist-punching the night away. After seeing how money and fame have ruined perfectly decent people and their families, shouldn’t we be organizing a Situation intervention? Who’s looking out for these malleable souls who’ve become mere caricatures of who they once were? I know the first two-thirds of the “MC Hammer: True Hollywood Story” were really good, but someone’s got to DVR the last bit for The Sitch, because throwing down buckets of cash does not do a body good. And once he’s got his own washer/dryer, tanning bed and home gym, the show’s going to get a whole lot less interesting. Is anyone else worried about this situation and the fate of our favorite guilty pleasure? [Perez Hilton, Seattle PI]