Shun, Shag, Or Marry: The Stars Of OWN Network

Mark your calendars! Less than six months until we can gorge on all Oprah programming all the time. With OWN’s launch date set for January 2011, the lineup is starting to come together. This week, it was confirmed that Rosie O’Donnell will be joining Shania Twain and Sarah Ferguson on the OWN team. All we know so far is that Rosie’s as yet unnamed daytime talk show will be based in New York and “fans can anticipate a fun, uplifting show with Ms. O’Donnell’s playful and energetic style.” Let’s hope it goes better than her stint on “The View.” Very important question: who from the lineup do we want to shun, shag, or marry? Find out after the jump. [Washington Post]Shun: Why the fallen Duchess of York would get offered a talk show on national television is beyond me. Maybe because she has struggled with weight issues like Oprah? Sarah Ferguson gets a shun from us. She’ll probably run away with her TV money and buy more booze. And I wouldn’t be surprised if she tries to sell insider Oprah info to the ‘bloids. [TV Squad]

Shag: Shania Twain is hot enough that we’ll be excited to watch claw her way back to the top after her Mutt Lange marriage fail. Twain’s show “Why Not? With Shania Twain “will be an hour-long reality series that will follow her on her personal journey filled with risk, revelations and unexpected adventures.” Sure, we’d shag her. Why not? [People]

Marry: This may be a controversial choice, but we could be happy listening to show tunes and working with disadvantaged children for the rest of our lives with Rosie O’Donnell. Even though she’s ultra-opinionated and sometimes abrasive, we need a partner who can make us laugh. Bonus: now we can also go to California and get hitched.