Now men can combine two of their favorite things: masturbation and competitive sports! The Count Machine Onahole is a revolutionary new masturbation device that keeps track of the number of strokes, calories burned, and the total time it takes for the user to achieve orgasm. For just $123 you can insert your throbbing member into a synthetic, plastic vag, attach the counting device, and pump away while the clock runs. And then, do it again and see if you can beat your best SPM (strokes per minute). The current record is held by a porn star who clocked in at 426 SPM. Beat that, guys! Literally. Beat it. [Weird Asia News]
